His Secret
by no73
Summary: To maintain his everyday routine and relationships Sheldon needed something. This something was just his little secret. But someone else became involved and things got complicated.
1. Chapter 1

He didn't like it but he needed it. He needed something that was just his and that meant he couldn't tell the others.

Sheldon waited until he had spoken to Amy online, had played Halo with Howard and Raj and after 'retiring' to his room, waited until he heard Leonard and Penny reach the noise level that would normally require him to put on his noise cancelling headphones. Then he quietly put on his black suit pants, a smart button down shirt and tie and left his room and the apartment without a sound.

If the others had seen him they would have questioned how Sheldon could get in a cab without his usual fuss and need for Purell, they would have questioned the confidence in his stride and been astounded at seeing him head into a club, order a JD and coke and stop and talk to a group of men they had never met before. This was a different Sheldon, one even his precious MeeMaw wouldn't recognise. This was the other side of Sheldon that he needed to release to enable him to function.

Em leant against the bat with her friends and watched half fascinated half amused as the men/boys drank laughed and tried to impress any women around them. Every month Em came with her best friend to this club to kick back relax and forget about he job in the fast moving investment world. The men were always here, well most of the group anyway. The tall dark one who seemed hell bent on drinking the JD bottle dry and going home with any women he could find was a new addition to the group. HE was loud and seriously in need of some advise if he thought his behaviour was appealing.

Em and Carmen moved to the dance floor and joined the other dancers moving laughing and generally enjoying themselves. She saw Sheldon watching but his flailing arms and manic looking grin did not exaclty draw her to him!

As the night moved on and Sheldon drank more, danced wildly and generally amused watchers around him, Em became drawn to him. His blue eyes were still amazingly clear which was remarkable considering his near inability to stand! He danced with a wild abandon she had not seen in an adult and his eyes seemed to follow her as she moved around the club talking to her friends.

His friends had all gradually paired of with various drunk girls but he leant against a post, or it held him up, as he watched her sipped his drink and waved his arms wildly. It was gettign late and Em signalled to Carmen she was going to go catch a cab. Carmen was dance slow and close to a guy she had met the previous week and had arranged to meet tonight so Em felt no guilt leaving her friend. As she climbed the stairs off the dance floor his hand reached out and grabbed her arm as she passed.

"Dance with me?" he slurred.

Now normally Em would have shaken him off and continued home but those eyes drew her in. She nodded in spite of herself and turned to him. He looked slightly stunned she had agreed but pulled her onto the dance floor into his arms and held her. Swaying slightly, but hardly dancing he didn't talk just held her and swayed. "What's your name?" Em asked lamely, more to have something to say than any real desire to know. "Sheldon" he slurred. Realising she had made a huge mistake and that he really was indeed very drunk Em went to pull away. As she moved her head back Sheldon turned his head and kissed her.

Em froze. He started gently, almost frightened, but as she didn't pull back straight away he slowly began to move his lips. His hand to moved to the back of her head and held her firm while he stroked her bottom lip gently with his tongue. Em gasped and opened her eyes . He was staring at her. It was kind of unnerving. He depend the kiss but never once moved his eyes from hers. Em pulled away . "I have to go" she mumbled and turning stumbled back up the stairs and out of the club without turning back.

Sheldon moved slowly back to the bar, ordered another drink and then he too left. Retracing his steps he got into a cab back to the apartment and quietly, Penny and Leonard seemed to have fallen asleep, moved back to his room. He took off his suit pants, folded them over and placed them in a bag in his closet. He put on his Friday pyjamas climbed into bed and was asleep almost immediately.

For the next 2 weeks Sheldon carried out his normal routine without a glitch. His research was moving along smoothly. His friends met and ate pizza watched star trek and argued over whether to play Halo or lazer chess. Amy Penny and Bernadette sometimes joined the boys, Amy still chatted with Sheldon every evening and Sheldon still refused to move there relationship onto a physical level. But Amy was happy Sheldon Cooper was her boyfriend and she had no worries he would look at anyone else!


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Hi I am very new to this writing lark as I am sure you can tell. This story has been in my head for a while so I am writing this for me really and just hope it doesn't bore everyone silly!**

Sheldon was late arriving this Friday night. The music was loud and fast, the club was packed and people were well on there way to celebrating another end to the working week. The group of men Sheldon hung out with were already there, drinking and chatting to a group of young women. Sheldon smiled a very un-Sheldon like smile waved and then weaved his way through the crowds towards the bar. He was again dressed in his smart black trousers, this time he had added the suit jacket over a crisp white shirt and electric blue tie. There was no sign of a super hero or layered top in sight and no sign of the awkward man struggling to deal with the mysteries of physics or those around him.

Em saw him arrive and pointed him out to Carmen. The girls had been coming to the club every week for the last month and Sheldon had been noticeable by his absence. But he was here now and Em watched him this time. Watched him down his first drink without pause and order another. Watched him chat easily with the group of men he had joined as he scanned the club casually. She knew the minute, second even, that he had seen her, as his drink stopped its journey to his lips and he raised an eyebrow towards her.

Em blushed. What was wrong with her! This man had been drunk, barely able to talk and had dragged her onto the dance floor, but all she could remember were those blue eyes and that kiss! She needed to get a grip!

Sheldon turned back to his friends and started talking about the football that was being played tomorrow. Anyone watching would have thought Sheldon spent every weekend discussing sport, there was no sign of the physicist, his germ phobia or his aversion to people in sight. The group got loud with laughing and shouting and general good natured ribbing and Em continued to watch Sheldon and wish he would come over.

It was a good 2 hours later that he appeared at her side. She had just begun to chat to a good looking guy from her office who had been pursuing her for weeks when she felt him. She turned to see those clear blue eyes looking seriously at her and as if on queue the music slowed and he grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the dance floor. Carmen and the two guys they had been with, stood open mouthed as Em let her self be pulled away. Sheldon said nothing he just pulled her close dipped his head and kissed her. It was as if those last few weeks hadn't happened. He held her head stared into her eyes and kissed her as if they were the only people there.

Em knew she was mad to let him pull her away from her friends , she knew she was mad to follow him to the dance floor but as he touched her lips her eyes closed and she was lost. She opened her eyes and he was still staring so she pulled back slowly. Sheldon moved his hand off the back of her head, reached down to hold her hand and pulled her off the dance floor towards a table set near the back of the club. Em followed behind and sat quickly turning to look directly at Sheldon.

"What are you doing?" she said as she looked at him.

"Hey! Just wanted to do that again without an audience!"

Em pulled back. "you don't even know my name! Do you think I am just one of those girls who comes here looking for men!"

Sheldon smirked. "No! Look if you want to sit and chat that's fine too. I just thought you were having fun!"

"I was, it just feels weird. I don't know you , I know nothing about you. Tell me your name, what you do then you will feel less of a stranger and it wont feel so odd!"

Sheldon smiled " I am Sheldon Cooper I work at a university, I like how you kiss!"

Em laughed. "OK, fair enough I like how you kiss too! Tell me Sheldon, are you married? Do you have a girlfriend?"

"No and No!" Sheldon answered without a flicker or Pause.

Em smiled "listen I have to go soon, but will you be here next week?"

This time Sheldon's eye did twitch slightly but he smiled smoothly and said " not sure Em, maybe, but I am sure we can meet up again soon"

Em pulled out her phone and said why don't we exchange numbers then if you are going to be here we can meet up maybe?"

The twitch was more noticeable this time and Sheldon looked uncomfortable "err I'm sorry Em look I have to go but I'll see you soon"

Sheldon got up stepped over Ems legs and walked past her, his friends at the bar and out the door without a backward glance.

Em was stunned. She had done it again, she had been impressed he remember her name, blinded by him kissing her,and by that reaction he must surely be married or have a girlfriend at least. One thing was for sure however good he kissed she would not fall for it again!

Outside Sheldon walked quickly to the row of waiting cabs. He climbed in gave the address of the apartment and lent back. His hands shook and his eye twitched. He needed his pyjamas and a cup of tea.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N Ok I kind of have this story planned in my head to the end, but would not mind if you gave me feedback. Not sure it will change where the story is going but would be appreciated. Thanks.**

Sheldon did not go back to the club for 2 months. His need was still there. The need to escape routine. The need to pretend football mattered. The need to just be. Every time the need crept up on him he remembered her questions. " Do you have a girlfriend? Do you want my number?" He did have a girlfriend. He had lied. It wasn't a lie to fit the need it was a lie because if he had told the truth she would have walked away.

Sheldon and Amy were getting closer. The relationship agreement had been adjusted to add dates, add hand holding and Sheldon was coping. Just. Amy seemed so happy. His friends commented on them as a couple in a much more positive way and Amy was happy. But when he lay on his Star wars covered pillows covered in his star wars covered duvet in his Thursday pyjamas Sheldon twitched and thought of Em.

He knew if he went back he would take her number. He knew he would kiss her again. Not like he kissed Amy with control and mouthwash and risk control. He would kiss her like he was not Dr Sheldon Cooper. He would kiss her and it would be a lie.

But he really wanted to kiss her.

Em kept one eye on the door. She spoke to Carmen and drank her vodka, but she kept one eye on the door. It was Friday and late and he was not here. The same as every Friday for the last month. Em had persuaded Carmen to go to the club every week and every week she had drank more vodka, got more depressed and spent the following week burying herself in work til late trying to convince herself she would not go back.

Tonight she had already had too many vodkas. The guys who had been buying them were chatting and moving closer but still she kept glancing at the door.

Nothing.

He wasn't coming.

She accepted the hand of Mike, let him lead her to the dance floor and smiled.

It wasn't the same. He wasn't as tall, his eyes did not have that startling blue clarity and she just felt nothing!

He was nice though, he asked about her job, where she lived, about her friends, but she felt nothing!

Em signalled Carmen their secret code, told Mike she needed the bathroom, grabbed her coat and left!

Sheldon sat in the cab. He was wearing his flash t shirt and plaid pants. He had told Leonard he had to get something from the office. He had lied! He sat inside the cab and watched the door of the club. He couldn't go in. He was Dr Sheldon Cooper and he couldn't go in. His eye twitched but he tapped the driver on the shoulder and gave the address for CalTech. As he glanced back one last time he saw her.

Em.

Leaving on her own. He smiled.

When he got back to the apartment he skyped with Amy, killed Leonard at Halo put on his Friday pyjamas and slept.

Dressed in his black suit, calm and confident, Sheldon walked into the club and ordered a drink. It was late and the place was again packed. He knew she was there, he had seen her arrive with her friend. He chatted at the bar and had a few more drinks. He noticed she was drinking a lot more than she had the previous time they had met up and he saw she was dancing in an animated fashion and was drawing the glances of many of the men round the dance floor. She was wearing a black dress with bright flowers covering it. Her heels were high and her hair was flowing over her shoulders.

Sheldon ordered 2 more drinks and drank them quickly. He could feel the tension leave, the numbers and equations in his head blurred and the only thing in focus was her.

The guys, his Friday friends, teased him good naturedly about his absence, laughed at his focus on Em, bought him more JD & c's and pushed him towards the dance floor. His dancing matched hers, energetic and happy, she spun and saw him, grinned and twirled so she ended in front of him. There was no discussion just a smile and then he was kissing her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, closed her eyes and let him kiss her as she had remembered.

As she opened her eyes Em saw Sheldon still looking at her. His tongue caressed hers and he groaned. She closed her eyes again and let herself just enjoy the feel of him. His hands began to move slowly down her back pulling her close. She could feel the beginnings of his erection and she held tighter, kissed him harder and swore to herself she would not ask all the questions that had been going round in her head for the past weeks.

Sheldon pulled back his head but still held her close. "You need to let me take you home. You shouldn't leave alone again."

Em looked at him closely. How had he know she had left alone last week? She wouldn't ask. Right now she just wanted Sheldon. On his own, whatever he wanted to give her. She would worry about the questions tomorrow.

"Come home with me?" she whispered.

Sheldon smiled, nodded, grasped her hand and led her off the dance floor. Em waved at Carmen who shook her head grinning and waved back.

Outside Sheldon quickly hailed a cab and got in the back next to her. She gave the driver her address and then let Sheldon kiss her again.

As the cab pulled to a stop Sheldon lent over and paid the fare, helped Em out and followed her quietly into her building.

Em suddenly felt nervous. She had had a lot to drink but knew the effects were wearing off. She wasn't a virgin but she was not that experienced. Sheldon seemed so confident and in control she suddenly felt shy and unsure.

As she closed her front door and put the lock across Sheldon bent down and kissed her neck.

"do you want a drink?" she asked nervously.

"No!" he took her hand and pulled her close. "where is the bedroom?"

Em swallowed and pointed feeling more and more nervous and more and more sober. She really needed a drink.

Holding her hand Sheldon headed toward the bed, turned smiled and kissed her again. Em couldn't relax, she pulled away and said she needed a drink and ran to the kitchen. She found her vodka in the freezer, poured a large glass and drank it quickly. Taking a deep breath she walked slowly back to the bedroom. Sheldon was sat on the bed. He had taken off his suit jacket and hung it over the back of her rocking chair. His trousers and shirt were on a hanger and he was sat in tight white underpants on her bed stroking her cat who had woken up and was purring happily at this unexpected attention. Em just stood staring. The vodka had taken the edge of her nerves but the sight of those pants made her chuckle.

Really? Smart designer suit and tighty whities! grinning she scooped up the cat put her in the hall closed the door and turned round. Sheldon looked at her lazily. He got up and moved towards her. He pulled her back to the bed, pushed her down then followed her covering her with his body.

He had turned on a side light so Em could see him clearly . His chest was slim and pale. He did not have much chest hair but he did still have a confidence that belied his thin frame. As he leant to kiss her his hands worked down the zipper on her dress and she felt the cool air on her skin. Sheldon pulled the dress down trailing his fingers over her breasts and down over her stomach. She sucked her stomach in as she became self conscious again aware of his bright blue gaze.

She closed her eyes to avoid his stare as Sheldon moved further down taking her dress and panties with him. She felt his breath between her legs felt his fingers graze her thighs and she whimpered as she squeezed her eyes shut. His tongue flicked her gently and she moaned. He didn't stop, his tongue and fingers moving faster and faster as she peeked down to where his head was buried she met those blue eyes still staring and she came in a fast burst. Sheldon stayed kissing her gently as she gradually stopped trembling.

He moved back up the bed and pulled her into his arms. He still had his underwear on and she could feel his erection but he made no further move just shushed her and stroked her back as she drifted into a vodka induced sleep.

When she awoke he had gone.


	4. Chapter 4

Em woke Saturday moaning with a groan. Her head thumped and a wave of shame washed over her. What had she done! She remembered coming hard and fast last night, she remembered Sheldon holding her … then nothing. How embarrassing! How would she face him again!

~73~~73~~73~

Sheldon meanwhile had left Ems with a feeling of guilt. What would Amy say if she knew. What would Penny and Bernadette do if they found out what he had done! He needed to stop. He needed to find somewhere else to go when the need overcame him, but he needed to forget what had just happened and get home and think of a reason why he was only just arriving home dressed in a suit and in desperate need of a shower!

As Sheldon unlocked the door to 2311 los Robles he was met with silence. He waited just inside the door but there was definitely no-one home so he quickly moved to his room took off his soiled clothes and moved to the bathroom to shower. As he washed he thought of the guys at the bar. The guys who knew him as Sheldon the teacher from uni, the guys who had seen him leave with Em. Last night they had a friend, Steve, with them Sheldon hadn't recognised but who said he went to Caltech but had never heard of Sheldon. Sheldon just hoped it stayed that way!

Once washed and changed into his plaid pants and batman t shirt and grey thermal Sheldon set about organising a presentation he had to give next week at work. It was a mindless job but at least that allowed his brain to switch off as he went through the possible bars he could go to instead of one he may bump into Em at. He knew from their short conversations where she worked, he know knew where she lived so with that in mind he decided the next time his brain felt like it was going to explode he would avoid those locations and maybe suggest to the guys a new venue.

~73~~73~~73~~73~

What Sheldon had not factored in to his little plan was Em was feeling embarrassed to the point that she too felt the need to avoid Sheldon and the club so had told Carmen she was working late this week and perhaps a new club and new people would be a good idea.

Carmen was fine with this. She was beginning to worry about the effect Sheldon was having on Em and that was before Em updated her on Friday nights activities! Em was drinking lots and obsessing about Sheldon, a new club sounded just the thing.

So that weekend Em volunteered to work late getting month end reports done much to the surprise but delight of her colleagues. Carmen took her latest man on a pub crawl and found a great club that played great music and was not far enough out to cost a fortune in cab fare.

Em was grateful.. The following weekend she joined Carmen and had a great night without having to watch the door. She did not feel the need to drink so much, just had fun with her friend unwinding , dancing and having fun. That night she fell into bed alone but happy.

~73~~73~~73~~73~

A the back of the lecture hall Steve looked up to see Dr Sheldon Cooper take to the stage for his presentation. It took Steve a moment to realise this looked like the guy he had been talking to the previous weekend. But this guy seemed uptight and twitchy. He was dressed in god awful pants and a t shirt that appeared to have a melting Rubik cube on it over a bright yellow thermal! Seriously he must just look like the guy at the bar who had been seriously smooth when putting the moves on that girl and disappearing with her into the night. He would hang back and see if he eased up when the pressure was off. Steve sat through the presentation and was seriously impressed. It couldn't be the same guy, this dude had a brain like no-one he had ever seen before. It couldn't be the guy chatting football and knocking back the J D's.

After the lecture Dr Cooper moved towards an uptight looking woman in a brown skirt and green cardigan buttoned up to the neck who had entered the auditorium. They seemed to know each other well and Steve watched Dr Cooper clean his hands on some wipes he pulled from his bag, wait whilst the woman did the same then took her hand and walked back down the corridor together.

No he must have been mistaken it couldn't be the same guy!

~73~~73~~73~

Sheldon felt the need build quicker this time. Amy was becoming a regular visitor to his office at lunch times and for pizza night and anything can happen Thursday. He felt more at ease with the hand holding, but when she launched at him to kiss him goodnight he still stiffened and kept his whole body tense for fear of letting the feeling he had for Em come washing back over him.

It was Friday night and he had agreed to meet the bar guys at a new place, they were already there when he arrived and Steve the new guy was there too. He kept staring at Sheldon and dropping Caltech into the conversation regularly. Sheldon drank more, trying to block out the possibility Steve had seen him at work. It wasn't long before Sheldon was waving his arms manically and weaving all over the dance floor. Drinking and dancing and trying to pretend he wasn't missing Em. The guys chatted up girls, bought Sheldon drinks and watched him dance. He was happy dancing and the more he drank the more he realised he was being silly.. With a wave he headed off out the door and gave the waiting cabbie Ems address.

~73~~73~~73~

the repetitive buzzing woke Em who had been happily sleeping with the cat curled on the end of her bed. She stumbled to the intercom heart thumping wondering what on earth had happened.

"hey kitten!" Sheldon slurred.

"Sheldon?" Em asked tentatively.

"I'm back!". Em buzzed open the door glanced down at her old t shirt and wished she didn't look like she had fallen out of bed, which she had!

Sheldon practically fell through the door, clasping Em round her waist as he did giggling and kissing her neck.

"Sheldon what are you doing? What are you doing here!" Em asked still dazed to see him stood before her.

Sheldon pushed Em back towards the bedroom still kissing her neck.

"Sheldon! What's going on?"

"I missed you!" he slurred into her neck as his hands found their way under her t shirt to stroke his way up over her stomach to her breasts. Em closed her eyes and tried not to moan at the sensation. Sheldon fell back on to the bed startling Ems cat who jumped off hissing. He giggled pushed her t shirt over her head and lunged at her chest. As his lips found her nipple Em did moan. She felt Sheldon smile and suck gently then he rolled over onto his back pulling her on top of him. Em could feel his erection through his suit pants and determined to see this through moved back down Sheldon's legs unbuttoning his shirt before moving on to his trousers. Sheldon was still giggling and appeared ticklish as her fingers grazed his side but as she removed his trousers and underwear and trailed her fingers over his penis he stopped giggling, stared into her eyes and smiled.

Em blushed. He looked gorgeous, if a little drunk, but as her fingers pumped him slowly he flipped her again and began to move down her naked body with his lips. He was so slow that Em began to squirm. As his lips touched her clit she stilled and almost stopped breathing.

It was just as she remembered. Sheldon's tongue moved fast over her and she cried out begging him to enter her but he just looked at her winked and held her hips still as his tongue did things to her that made her teeth tingle!

As she cried out Sheldon moved fast, covering her mouth with his and thrusting hard into her still trembling body. Em grasped his neck and kissed him hard. Clinging to him as she felt the pressure build in her stomach again moving down as Sheldon thrust hard and fast. He made no sound at all just stared into her eyes as he kissed her then throwing his head back as she felt his body tense and his penis throb as he pumped into her. He collapsed on top of her and was instantly asleep!

Em stared at the man half on top of her and half next to her. She could smell the alcohol on his lips but her body was still tingling form the way he had made her feel. She smiled and closed her eyes and slept.


	5. Chapter 5

Em woke to feel his tongue licking her gently, first he thighs then her clit. She stretched and moaned.

"Mmmm wow good morning! You can wake me like this ever day!"

Sheldon did not reply just moved his hands over her breasts to play with her nipples as his tongue moved faster.

"mmmmm Sheldon!" Em came with a shout and stroked her fingers through Sheldon's hair.

"Come here!" she said as she pulled him back into her arms.

Sheldon smiled as he kissed her easing his penis slowly into her. This morning he was slow and gentle. His blue eyes still intense as they read her emotions that she couldn't hide as her brought her to another amazing orgasm. As she tipped over the edge Sheldon thrust hard one last time and throbbed his release into her burying his face into her neck.

He still hadn't spoken, he just lay quietly holding her. Em wasn't sure what to say. He had arrived drunk, hardly said a word, passed out and now just held her gently as she tried to work out how to say "what's going on "and make it not sound like she hadn't had the best night of her life!

She rolled to look at him. He looked tired and rumpled. His hair was sticking up and his normally crystal blue eyes were ringed in purple smudges but he smiled and leant in to kiss her then muttered quietly

"I'm sorry Em but I really need to go"

She didn't know what to say so she just nodded and watched as he put on his socks and under pants then his suit, which he shook out and smoothed down.

Then he was gone!

Em lay back on her bed put her arm over her eyes squeezing them shut to stop the tears, then slept.

~73~73~73~

The following Friday Em had gone to a bar with Carmen then returned home only to be awoken again at 2am by Sheldon drunk and buzzing on her door. She let him in, guided him unsteadily to the bed and helped him undress. Sheldon was really drunk. He looked at her through bleary eyes then passed out. Em sat watching him. Why had he come. He didn't make sense. She lay down next to him and fell back to sleep..

She was awoken again by Sheldon's tongue stroking her. She kept her eyes closed and lay enjoying the sensation.. He was gentle and very very thorough as her body shook in climax he kissed his way back up her body and lay with his head on the pillow next to her. She reached out her hand to stroke his very obvious erection and he groaned . She kissed his neck his shoulders and chest before moving down to take him in her felt his hands move to her head but he gently pulled her up and lifted her onto him. As she lowered her body onto his he groaned again and Em moaned. She moved faster feeling his hands on her hips urging her on. As she came she shouted "I love you" and Sheldon froze.

"What did you say" he questioned quietly. Em felt the heat rise in her face as she buried into his neck "nothing " she muttered.

"you did, you definitely said something!"

Em sat up and smiled brightly. "No Sheldon I didn't"

She got out of the bed went into the kitchen and started to make coffee. The simple task hiding the confusion she felt.

Sheldon was dressed by the time she returned to her room. He declined the coffee saying he had errands to run and was gone before she could blink.

What had she done! As the words had left her mouth she had known she meant them but she had also known now was definitely not the right time to say them!

Sheldon shared so little with her, in fact most of the time he was drunk and if she was honest the only thing they had in common was how good they were in bed together. But when she looked at him asleep, or into his eyes she didn't care. She had a feeling Sheldon would not be back next Friday though!

~73~73~73~

In a way Em was right. It was the next night that Sheldon reappeared! Equally as drunk but just as affectionate as the previous evening again he held her and stroked her. Again he said very little and again was gone as the sun rose.

When he left Em cried.

She phoned Carmen and arranged to go out with her the following weekend and to stay overnight round there. Em knew she needed to start protecting herself.

~73~73~73~

Sheldon sat in his office on that Sunday morning staring at his white board. He could see the answers and he knew he was one step closer to his goal. He should have felt happy but he didn't.

He changed into the spare chinos, thermal and t shirt that he had taken to storing in his desk draw. He bagged up the suit which he dropped in at the dry cleaners on the way home then walked home, thinking of what he would say to Leonard and Amy.

When he got home Sheldon went to his desk and opened his computer ready to Skype with Amy. As she answered his call Sheldon smiled at her trusting face and began to tell her about his work. As he spoke his excitement grew and at her suggestion agreed to go out for dinner just the 2 of them to celebrate. Guilt made Sheldon agree. Amy was thrilled. Ringing Penny as soon as she had said goodbye to Sheldon the girls planned her outfit whilst Sheldon returned to his room lay on his bed and slept.

~73~73~73~

The restaurant was the one they had visited for their anniversary. It was quiet with a few people at the bar drinking and talking quietly. Sheldon and Amy slipped into their normal routine of exchanging news about their work, and chit chat about their friends. Amy was surprised when Sheldon held her hand across the table, especially as he did not even seem to register he had done it. He paid the bill at the end of their meal and reached for her hand as they made to leave.

He didn't see Steve and the other guys from the club staring. Open mouthed they watched the couple leave.


	6. Chapter 6

Em knew she was pregnant without needing to take the test. What she didn't know was how she was going to tell Sheldon and how he would react. She was scared. She loved him, she really really did, but she was very aware she knew very little about him and their relationship was based on sex! How was this going to make her look! Other than Carmen nobody in her circle of friends or family knew she was in any kind of relationship, and a child would come as a bigger shock to them than it had to her!

But for all her doubts she knew she could not get rid of the baby. A Baby! What on earth was she going to do.

Em lay down on her side, looked at her peacefully sleeping cat and wished things were different.

~73~73~73~

"So Amy, shall I take your silence as a sign of acceptance", said Sheldon quickly looking hopefully at his girlfriend.

Amy smiled "Yes Sheldon! I am finding I can not see any objections and am happy to accompany you to the doctors so you can get your flu jab, _**but**_ after I expect you to come with me to buy a present for Penny for her birthday!"

silence...

"...Counterproposal... you come and hold my hand while I get my flu jab and I will let you take me for an ice cream sundae ..."

"**S****HE****LDON**! every time I make a suggestion you have a counter proposal... I thought we had made progress last week at dinner when you held my hand with out prompting but I was obviously wrong!"

Sheldon paused, replaying their last date back in his mind, had he held her hand? Why would he have done that? He knew he was slipping more lately, in his timekeeping and routines, why only this morning he was 1 minute late into his bathroom routine because he was humming a song he had in his head that he had heard at the club. He knew Leonard had noticed but thankfully hadn't mentioned it. And as Amy had just pointed out he was more than comfortable touching her in public when his mind was elsewhere. He needed to get a grip! He needed to stop seeing Em, stop thinking about Em, stop going to clubs and concentrate! Otherwise that Nobel prize would remain out of reach and before he knew it he would be just like everyone else!

Sheldon sighed "OK I agree, but I really need to be back to the apartment by 6 as I have to finalise the proposal to give to Gablehauser by tomorrow"

Amy smiled "deal!"

~73~73~73~

Carmen put down the phone frowning. Steve had just finished telling her about seeing Sheldon and another women. Should she tell Em? She knew Em was out of sorts lately but she deserved to know, if only so that when she next saw Sheldon she could see if he mentioned it. Slowly and very reluctantly Carmen called Em.

~73~73~73~

As Em put down the phone from Carmen she really didn't know what to do. She had not told Carmen about the pregnancy yet. She hadn't told anyone. Now she had to think seriously about what she had just heard. Sheldon had been seen twice with what appeared to be the same woman and it seemed it was more than a business colleague. She needed to stay calm and she really really needed to talk to Sheldon.

But even as she thought this Em realised she had no way of contacting him. She knew he worked at Caltech but she couldn't exactly wander onto the campass searching for a lecturer. She did not have his address or phone number. All she could do was go back to the club and hope he turned up. So much for staying away!

~73~73~73~

Sheldon let go of Amy's hand and rolled his sleeve back down.

" See that wasn't to bad was it?" said Amy as she patted Sheldon's hand.

"No I guess not" Sheldon replied his lower lip sticking out, " but I think I may need to go home and lie down now!"

"No way Sheldon, we had a deal. Penny needs a present to reflect her importance in our lives and you are going to help me choose it!"

Sheldon muttered as he slowly followed Amy to her car.

"Now what do you think, any ideas of what we-should buy the birthday girl?" asked Amy cheerfully.

Sheldon muttered again, fastened he seat belt, and looked out of the window. As they drove towards the mall Sheldon stared blankly out of the window. He could feel the pressure building but knew he had to resist.

He turned to look at Amy.

"Amy, Penny is your bestie, you are so much better at this than me. What do you think we should get her?"

Amy looked surprised at Sheldon's tone but grinned happily and began listing all her ideas. Sheldon nodded but said nothing. After parking the car the pair walked towards the shops. Sheldon reached for Amy's hand. She looked down again surprised but said nothing . Inwardly wincing Sheldon knew he had to move forward with this, with Amy. He knew he was capable he just had to move forward...

~73~73~73~

Friday night, club packed, Em stood in corner sipping a coke and wishing she were anywhere else but here.

She had told Carmen her news, practically had to tie her down to stop her beating Steve and the guys for info on Sheldon and sworn her to secrecy. She had to do this her way. She just wished she didn't feel so sick!

Meanwhile Sheldon stood outside, across the street, watching. Dressed for a bus ride, bag across his chest. He so wanted to go in. But it was date night and Amy would be waiting.

~73~73~73~

Em had left at midnight unable to stand the churning in her stomach every time the door opened, unable to stand the sympathetic looks from Carmen or the curious glances from the guys at the bar. Swearing Carmen to secrecy making her promise she would not give the guys any info or even talk to them Em left and went home. She lay in bed half expecting a drunken call. Eyes blurred with tears she lay with her hand on her stomach wondering if she had made the wrong decision.

~73~73~73~

Penny groaned as the ringing phone woke her. Peering at the clock she saw it was 8 am. Who on earth would be calling at this time on a Saturday morning!

" 'llo" she grunted into the phone"

"Bestie you'll never guess!" shrieked a very excited Amy " Sheldon kissed me! he actually kissed me!

Penny jolted upright suddenly awake "Ames, tell me what happened!

" Oh Penny it was so romantic. We had a lovely meal just as you suggested, spaghetti and cut up hot dogs, Sheldon seemed a little distant but when we sat to watch the documentary on apes I had recorded"

penny sniggered.

"but suddenly , and really I have no idea why, he put his arm around my shoulders pulled me towards him and kissed me! really kissed me Penny, he bit my lip, tugged my hair and … and .. slipped me the tongue!"

Penny sat with her mouth hanging open.

"oh Penny I don't know what to do now. Should I mention it? Should I call him? Should I -"

"Ames slow down... this is the same Sheldon Cooper who needed to draw up an agreement just to hold hands?!"

"Yes Penny that's why I am confused!"

"Amy I a sorry but I am as stunned as you are. Pleased for you but wow talk about unexpected!"

"Penny I am meant to be going to the zoo with Sheldon tomorrow, will you come round today and help me decide what to wear?"

"Of course I will Sweetie. Just let me have some coffee, digest what you have told me and I'll be right over!"

~73~73~73~

Sheldon lay staring at his ceiling. What had he done. He knew he had made a mistake the minute he had pulled Amy towards him but he had spent the whole evening thinking about Em, and the urge to kiss her had just taken over. In fairness kissing Amy had been pleasant. She had seemed unresponsive at first but looking back he guessed she was probably in shock! She wasn't Em, she kissed differently she smelled different and she tasted different too but it was nice and it was not as unpleasant as he had expected. It was definitely better than watching those stupid monkeys that's for sure!

It had also made him come to a decision. Tonight he would go to the club, if Em wasn't there he would go to hers and tell her everything. Well maybe not everything! He would tell her he had a girlfriend, he owed her that truth , and he would explain why he couldn't see her again. Then he would come home and make sure Amy never ever found out!


	7. Chapter 7

The club was busy. Sheldon leaned against the bar drink in hand and realised how much he would miss this. For a man who didn't drink this 4th JD and coke sure was going down well. He was half listening to the guys discuss the afternoon football, half watching the door.

No sign of Em.

Her friend was here, glaring at him every time he caught her eye. Sheldon just ordered another drink, joined in the football discussion, and blocked her out. He really didn't need any hassle. He was here to see Em then he would be gone.

~73~73~73~

Ems phone chimed. She knew it would be Carmen. They had arranged that if Sheldon turned up at the club she would text. Now Em needed to make a decision. Get ready and go face him or never face him and never tell him about the baby.

Em knew it wasn't really an option. She slowly got up of the sofa and made her way to the bathroom. There was no way she could have a child and not tell the father. She knew Sheldon needed to know. Having spent every waking hour going over it in her head Em knew she would do this alone if she had too but she also secretly hoped she wouldn't have too.

She wasn't stupid though and knew tonight could very well be the last she ever saw or heard from Sheldon once he knew, so she wanted to stack the odds in her favour.

She wasn't showing yet so she chose the dress she was wearing the night she first met Sheldon. She took care with her hair and make-up put on her highest, sexist shoes and headed out. She was not going to be drinking tonight so decided to take her car. At least this way she would also have a quick exit if necessary!

Pulling up in the car park at the back of the club Em fired of a quick text to let Carmen know she was arriving and taking a big breath set off to face her future.

~73~73~73~

Sheldon didn't see Em enter. He was laughing at a joke Steve had made. He could feel the effect the drink was having as he felt the weeks tension drain away and the alcohol lower his inhibitions. His hips began to move to the music and as he sank his drink he followed the guys onto the dance floor.

How would he cope without this. Maybe he could persuade Amy to go clubbing with him! Sheldon sniggered internally at this thought and moved faster as the music sped up. As he turned on the floor he saw her! She was stood watching him. He stopped immediately walked towards her slowly pulled her into his arms dipped her backwards Hollywood style and kissed her!

He could feel her smile as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back. They stood on the dance floor totally oblivious to everyone around them, arms around each, other tongues entwined .

~73~73~73~

"Hey" said Sheldon softly as he pulled back.

"Hey yourself" smiled Em.

"Come on lets go" Sheldon muttered as he grabbed her hand and pulled her to the door.

Em could feel Carmen watching, she could feel the guys watching, but she just looked into Sheldon's deep blue eyes smiled, nodded and trotted along after him.

Once outside Em took control pulling Sheldon towards her car.

"You drove?" He questioned quietly, frowning.

" Yeah, I was on may way home from work when Carmen called me" lied Em quickly, not wanting to tell Sheldon the real reason she had her car.

Sheldon nodded, waited for her to unlock, then folded his tall frame into her small red car. As Em got in Sheldon was immediately upon her, hands in her hair, lips on her neck, moving up towards hers. Em grinned but pushed him back.

" Hold on there cowboy" she grinned, putting the car into drive and making her way back to her place.

As she drove she felt Sheldon's hand creep up her leg under her skirt. She giggled and slapped his hand.

"Hey I'm trying to concentrate here!" she laughed.

"You are doing fine" he slurred "don't mind me!"

Em put her foot down gasping as she felt Sheldon's long fingers rub the edge of her panties.

The brakes slammed on as she arrived at her apartment. She put the car into park, turned off the engine and threw herself at Sheldon. Groaning Sheldon thrust his tongue into her mouth at the same time as he slipped his fingers into her now very wet pussy.

"Inside" Em gasped reluctantly pulling away. Sheldon nodded and followed.

**A/N Sorry only quick update today will do more tomorrow. Let me know what you think so far :-)**


	8. Chapter 8

Sheldon lifted Em up as the door closed and sat her on the sideboard next to the door. Em gasped when she looked at Sheldon, his eyes were almost navy they were so dark with desire. He rubbed his thumbs over her nipples and pleasure shot through her. "I need to taste you" he said but it barely registered Ems mind was in a blur. The next thing she knew his lips were suckling her breasts as she arched her back towards his mouth.

Sheldon laughed softly as he looked at her obvious arousal. He grabbed her hand and guided it down to his erection straining the zip of his trouser. They both moaned.

"God I need you" Sheldon groaned pulling her back into his arms and moving towards the bedroom. As they almost fell onto the bed Sheldon said " I want to make you feel good, that's all I want tonight Em." She believed him.

Sheldon unzipped her dress and moved it down her body following it with his lips. He ran kisses over her stomach as he moved lower, pushing of her dress and then her panties. His tongue swirled over her clit then swept into her pussy. Em arched into his mouth moaning as she felt the tension pool and build then she came, biting her lip to keep from crying out.

Sheldon hadn't finished though and slowly moved back up her body kissing her gently. He stopped to stand and without breaking her gaze unbuttoned his shirt and unzipped his pants. Em looked at him standing in front of her. His erection jutting out. She held out her hand and whispered "Sheldon please" and he stepped forward. Em grasped his erection slowly moving her fingers up his length and over the smooth head. Sheldon groaned. Quickly removing her hand and laying down between her legs.

Em cried out as Sheldon thrust into her hard and fast. She grabbed his hips buried her head into his shoulder and groaned as he pumped faster knowing she was about to come again so soon . AS he felt the tremors hit her body and heard her moan Sheldon let out a roar as he found his own release, throwing back his head and pulling Em with him.

~73~73~73~

As the sun broke through the blinds in the bedroom Em heard Sheldon turn off the tap in the bathroom. She hadn't heard him get up, but knew if she didn't get up now too he would be gone again, and she would not have had a chance to talk to him. She lay there trying to compose herself, how on earth was she going to do this!

As the bathroom door opened Em got up and, realising she would be at a distinct disadvantage if Sheldon had dressed, she quickly threw on a hoodie and pair of sweat pants. Sexy! She thought in disgust as she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror as she headed to the door.

Sheldon was stood with his back to her, texting someone on his cell phone.

"Hi" Em said brightly as she entered the room.

Sheldon jumped and spun round. "er... Hi" he replied. Em noticed a slight twitch over his right eye as he pushed his phone back into his pocket.

"You ok? Want some coffee? Tea?" she asked as she moved to the kitchen to fill the kettle.

"no... thanks... I er.. I need to go" Sheldon's eye twitched again and Em frowned.

"Sheldon please, I need to talk to you, I wanted to last night, that's why I was at the club, we kind of got distracted, and I really didn't mean for that to happen I promise you, but we do need to talk."

Sheldon frowned "are you OK." he stepped closer, no longer twitching, "Em... what's wrong"

Cursing herself as her eyes filled with tears Em put her head down and busied her self making two teas, Sheldon just watched. With her back to him she said quietly" I don't think you are going to like this"

"Are you seeing someone else" said Sheldon. Even as the words left his mouth he knew he had no rights to feel this possessive but the very thought of Em with another man...Sheldon shuddered.

"No Sheldon, no, its just I... Oh god... Sheldon I'm pregnant"

As Em raised her head she saw Sheldon standing there a blank expression on his face. Em moved forward unable to stand the distance and put her arms round his waist tucking her head into his shoulder so she didn't have to look at those eyes. The eyes that were so hot and dark last night but now looked cold and blank.

"Sheldon I sorry! I didn't mean for this to happen."

Sheldon held her as she shivered but didn't say anything.

"Sheldon, talk to me please, say something"

"Is it mine?" he asked quietly.

Em nodded.

"Ok." He moved his arms from around her and reached for his phone. Turning his back he dialled a number .

"Hey its me, I am going to be a little late I've been held up... no nothings wrong... no I will be there, just tell Raj to carry on with the numbers and I will see you later."

Em listened. This was a different Sheldon, cold, professional, no nonsense.

Who was Raj? Who had he called?

There was so much she didn't know about him!

Em moved to collect the tea and took both cups to the sofa. She sat down and watched as Sheldon slowly returned the phone to his pocket, rubbed his hand over his face and turned.

"Sheldon I know this is a shock. It was to me too. I am not asking anything from you but you needed to know."

Sheldon just nodded.

"What do you want to do?" he asked quietly.

"well I am keeping the baby" Em answered quickly" I couldn't get rid of it, I just couldn't. I just... Sheldon I just feel scared. I don't know you, not really. I know you are a teacher but that's it."

Sheldon twitched again. " I work at CalTech, I am a Physicist. I will give you my mobile and office number but Em, **please**, do not call me unless it is urgent. I can not take calls at work. Give me your number and I will call you in the week. I am sorry Em but I do have to go. I will call you though" Sheldon placed a kiss on her head but wouldn't meet her eye.

Em moved away from Sheldon and wrote her mobile and home number on a piece of paper, passing it too him without saying anything. She looked at him and realised how in the space of a few hours they had gone from tearing each others clothes off to being unable to look at each other.

She followed Sheldon to the door.

"I will call Em" he said quietly.

Em nodded, then unable to help herself reached up to put her hand on the side of his face and standing on her toes gently kissed him.

Sheldon bent towards her and kissed her back. It was gentle and sweet and Em smiled at him as she pulled away holding open the door and watched him walk away.

Sheldon didn't turn back and Em wondered if she would see or hear form him again.

~73~73~73~


	9. Chapter 9

Sheldon walked the streets. He was in shock. He knew he couldn't call Em. He needed to get his life and routine back. He ignored the voice in his head telling him he is wrong, telling him to go back. He carried on walking and tried to focus on his work.

He was on auto pilot and without realising is back in his office, frantically writing on his white boards. The equations that he has spent weeks pondering seem to be solving themselves. In his head Sheldon keeps repeating "I need to work, I need to focus."

This 'need' means he misses halo night, date night and paint balling. Raj is worried. The others don't seem so concerned. Even Amy is not too worried as Sheldon calls every night and Skype's when he can. He has locked himself into a fierce routine.

The only time Sheldon admits his feeling is in his log. He has taken to carrying his recorder around with him and filling it in at work when alone in his office or when no-one is in the apartment. As he speaks aloud into his tape recorder he composes the thoughts he has been suppressing. He talks quietly of his feelings for Em, how her lack of judgement and her acceptance of him as a man is totally unlike any relationship he has had before. He talks of the release alcohol has given him. Freeing his mind for a few hours from the constant problems and numbers always in his head. And he talks of sex and how the physical release has eased his tension but also of the comfort he never ever thought he would find, holding and touching another person or being held or touched. After each entry into his log Sheldon returns to his work at the same frantic pace unaware that anyone has noticed the change in him.

It is during one of these office recordings that Raj overhears Sheldon talking about the comfort he finds being held. Raj, hand on door backs away quietly, it doesn't make sense.

~73~73~73~

Em sat for a long time after Sheldon left just staring at the wall. She had done the right thing by telling him so why did she feel so bad! Deciding to call Carmen and tell her that Sheldon knew the truth Em picked up the phone taking a big breathe and bracing herself. Carmen answered on the second ring.

"Hey Em! hows things? did you and your man have fun!"

"No! I told Sheldon last night I was pregnant!"

silence...

"Carmen, did you hear me? Please talk to me, I cant take the silent treatment from you too!"

"Em, I don't know what to say, you know I am here for you but have you realise what this means! Your job, your whole life. A baby! Oh my God Em! A baby! Hang on, what do you mean 'from me too'? What did Sheldon say?

" He didn't really say anything, he asked if the baby was his, gave me his number then left!"

"listen Em I am at work now, how about I come round after and we have a catch up, I think I am in shock and I think there a few details you may have missed out in what you and the good teacher have been up too!"

Em smiled and agreed, thankful that Carmen did not appear to be judging her. Realising she will need her friend more than ever and she knew a full confession was in order!

Sat nursing a hot chocolate dressed in jogging bottoms and a vest top Em realised her and Carmen hadn't had a night in just chatting for a long while. She couldn't look her friend in the face as she started to tell her story.

Carmen's mouth remained tightly closed as she watched Em fight with her emotions

"I hadn't realised I had fallen in love with him, it was meant to just be fun. I hardly know him. We are always so drunk. So drunk we didn't use contraception, so drunk it didn't even occur to me the next day! And when I was sober and he was the only one drunk I was just so grateful he wanted to see me, so happy that I became one of those stupid girls who looses her brain over a guy who probably doesn't think about her from one drunken weekend to the next!"

"Oh Em!" Carmen moved to give her friend a hug. "It'll work out, I am sure once he has time to process it Sheldon will call. He looks so into you how could he not!"

Em half grinned half grimaced. "Yeah with half a bottle of JD in him he sure is into me! But Carmen if you could see him when sober its like a different guy. Quiet, twitchy, so not the guy who has me screaming in pleasure!"

Carmen sniggered. "Listen give him a few days and if you haven't heard by Friday what say we go seek out Steve and the guys at the club and see what they know?"

"I cant go back there, I don't mind you asking the guys but I cant go back, cant face them knowing how stupid I have been! If you do see Sheldon though or the others, tell him I need to see him, talk to him,"

"Ok will do, but if he is there don't expect me to play nice! You didn't do this on your own and there is something about him that I don't get, something doesn't add up"

~73~73~73~

Sheldon finds his work is progressing at an amazing rate. He has almost cut off all communication with his friends. The guilt he feels when he looks at them, especially Amy is getting to him, so by staying locked in his office he can avoid the guilt, pretend Em doesn't exist and make huge steps in his research.

He doesn't count on Raj however, who has grown more concerned for his friend, and decides he needs to find out what is going on.

"Hey dude! Hows things, we missed you last night and for Halo, what's going on?" Raj asks quietly closing the door to Sheldon's office behind him.

Sheldon keeps his back to Raj, saying he has been under stress and handling it wrong. He is know feeling better and things should return to normal.

"Listen Sheldon I know something is wrong. I know you are avoiding us. Even Amy is beginning to notice!"

Sheldon's shoulder slump and he turns to face his friend. "Really? She has said something?"

Raj is shocked when he looks at Sheldon, he looks like he hasn't slept or eaten in weeks and his face is lined with concern.

"Of course she has noticed, she is your girlfriend who you speak to every day and suddenly she is lucky if she gets a text from you! How do you think she feels, she is round at Penny's most nights hoping to bump into you and I'm not kidding dude, they are talking about going clubbing to have fun and you don't want that!"

Sheldon sits at his desk buries his fingers into his hair and sighs.

"I cant see her, I just cant, I need time"

Have you had an argument? Asks Raj surprised. Sheldon shakes his head.

"Ok Sheldon listen, it is anything can happen Thursday, Leonard and Howard are going with Penny and Bernadette to dinner and to catch a movie, Amy is working and you and I are going to the nearest bar and you are not leaving until you tell me what is going on.!"

What surprises Raj more than how Sheldon looks and has been acting is the act he caps his board marker stands up and meekly puts on his coat .

Something is definitely wrong!

The men enter a quiet bar near the university campus and sit in a booth . Raj orders a beer for himself and a diet cola for Sheldon. Sheldon says nothing. Raj watches him and tries to think how he can get Sheldon talking.

"Sheldon, tell me why you have been avoiding us, what is wrong"

"I have been going out" says Sheldon quietly, playing with the straw in his drink and not looking at Raj, "I have been going to a club, drinking, dancing and I have been in a relationship with another girl"

Raj laughs, "Ok don't tell me if you don't want to but I only want to help!"

Sheldon looks up "Raj I am serious. Her name is Em, we met at the club, she doesn't really question me, doesn't know what I do so doesn't talk about science, we just drink dance and have sex"

Raj, mouth hanging open says " Wow!"

"its not 'Wow' Raj, it is a mess. My whole life is falling apart except for my work. I was right all along, I need to forget relationships and just work!"

"Sheldon I don't know what to say I just didn't expect this, I know you would never hurt Amy on purpose, but have you thought how she will react if she find s out that not only will you not kiss her but that you have been, to quote Howard, 'doing the dance with no pants' with someone else"

Yes Raj I am aware of this. That's why I have been shutting myself in my office. I can't face her. Or Leonard , or Penny can you imagine how they will react!"

"ok Sheldon, I need to think about this. I agree the others will be shocked, I am shocked dude, lets give it a few days and I will think of something. It will be ok Sheldon."

Sheldon smiles sadly. He hasn't even told Raj about the baby and he knows his friend is in shock. Maybe he should just go home to Texas.


	10. Chapter 10

~73~73~73~

Amy is worried and sad. Things had been going so well. She had a boyfriend, a real life boyfriend, who was not only smart but sexy too! He called her, texted her and skyped her everyday. He took her to the zoo, the museum and came to visit her at work. He now held her hand without her having to ask, and was much much better at general affection.

So what had she done wrong? It didn't make sense. She had replayed in her head all the conversations they had had and she really couldn't think what she must have done to upset him. There was only once answer. She would call her Bestie, Penny would know what to do . Girls night!

The girls hadn't been together for a girls night in a while, Amy and Bernadette brought the wine, Penny supplied the snacks and make-up and together they giggled and played dress up and had fun. Only when they were well into bottle number 3 did the boys come up in conversation. Penny and Bernadette were sniggering about Leonard and Howard trying to outdo each other on date night . Amy just sat listening.

" Come on Ames", said Penny, slightly slurring her words" What has the great Dr Whack-a-doodle been up too, Give us the gossip!"

Amy sighed. "I don't know what he has been up to. He doesn't call, Skype or visit any more, he sometimes sends me a text but they all say the same thing _' Sorry Amy really busy, hope you are well, yours Dr Sheldon Cooper'_

What have I done wrong?"

Penny and Bernadette looked shocked. "Amy, sweetie, Sheldon is an idiot! You haven't done anything wrong! Listen lets not turn this into a gloom fest, lets go out tomorrow grab the guys hit a club and force Dr Sheldon Cooper to his silly senses"

"I don't know guys," sighed Amy "he really is avoiding me. Maybe if **you** ask he will say yes?"

"Well I must admit I haven't seen him lately either, whenever I go see Leonard its just us, I hadn't really questioned it we have just made the most of it" said Penny winking.

"I will text Howie now. " said Bernadette whipping out her phone, Penny did the same and within seconds there was the pinging of replies as Howard assured them he would be delighted to accompany them and that Raj would be coming too. Leonard although not so exuberant was happy to see Penny all dressed up. He said when Sheldon returned home he would inform him of their plans and they would meet in 4A and go together.

~73~73~73~

When the girls arrive the next night Sheldon isn't there. Raj notices Amy's face fall and looks at Penny who also, noticing puts an arm round her shoulder.

"So where is Dr Whack-a-doodle?" she asks angrily

" Calm down Penny, says Leonard soothingly " I called and told him our plans last night as he was at work, in fact he was gone before me this morning, on the bus! But he said he had to finish so work with the lazer then would follow us down. I even checked and his black suit is gone so he wasn't just saying it!"

Amy relaxes and pulls away from Penny and say to Raj " well looks like you got yourself a date " and winks at him.

Raj half smiles and gulps down the rest of his beer.

The group head out to the club. None had been before but Howard said he heard someone at work talking about it and it was meant to be cool.

The group trooped in and headed straight for the bar. They had persuaded Raj to stay off the grasshoppers so he was drinking wine with the girls and Howard and Leonard were drinking beer. The club was busy but not packed so they were able to stand and see what was going on with out getting pushed around. Penny grabbed the girls and moved to the dance floor. Raj wanted to join them but was in the middle of a heated conversation with Howard.

The girls were having fun dancing and drinking and Amy, although concerned Sheldon hadn't arrived, resolved to forget about him and was delighted when Raj joined them on the dance floor. They were drawing lots of attention to themselves with Penny and Bernadette in short tight dresses and Amy in a not so tight but very flattering A line dress. Their general laughing was contagious and soon they had an audience and then a group of followers! Howard and Leonard watched quietly propping up the bar.

~73~73~73~

One man watching the new comers seemed particularly interested and watched Amy closely.

" I tell you its her! That is the girl I saw with Sheldon at the university!"

"No way! He wouldn't be interested in her when he had Em at home" winked one of the guys to Steve.

Steve turned to Howard "hey buddy are you with them over there" he asked nodding at Raj and the girls.

Howard puffed out his chest. "that fine filly in red is my wife " he said proudly "and yes we are all together."

"Are the other girls taken?"Asked Steve putting down his drink and moving as if to join the girls on the dance floor.

Leonard jumped in quick "yes they are taken!"

"ok buddy calm down " laughed Steve and moved away nodding to his group of friends.

Amy moves away from the group signalling she is going to get her drink. As she moves towards Howard and Leonard she pulls out her phone and seeing no messages decides she will take the initiative and texts Sheldon.

"_Sheldon are you ok? Please say you are coming down I have a diet virgin cuba libre on ice for you here"_

she presses send and frowns.

Raj moves to join Amy and asks if she is ok. She nods and tells him she hasn't heard from Sheldon. Raj checks his phone and sees he has 3 missed calls all from Sheldon. He moves to order another drink for Amy then excuses himself. Out of earshot Raj returns Sheldon's call.

"Hey Sheldon what is going on! Amy is getting upset you promised you would come!"

"Raj, which club are you at?"

Raj tells him the name of the club and hears Sheldon groan.

"Raj I cant meet you. That is the club I go to with Em. People know me there, you need to stay with Amy and make an excuse. Raj I cant be seen there!

Raj can hear the desperation in his friends voice but he is angry at Sheldon.

"Listen Sheldon you need to man up. Your girlfriend is here and she wants you with her. Sheldon... Sheldon... " but Sheldon has hung up.

Raj is angry and moves back to the bar and orders a drink. He moves back to stand with Amy and drinks the drink he had left there too. Amy is smiling and watching Penny and Bernadette flirt with some guys on the dance floor, she laughs out loud as Howard and Leonard move in to claim their women!

" Seriously can you believe those two" she chuckles at Raj.

He smiles shakes his head, takesher had and pulls her along to join the group.

Amy feels her phone vibrate and looks at her message while dancing. It is from Sheldon "_so sorry problem at work cant get away yet"_ her face falls. She leans over and shows Raj. He shakes his head grabs her hand and spins her round. "Screw him" yells Raj over the music. Amy smiles and takes a deep breath. She realises she has good friends around her and this is what she has always wanted. Sheldon will wait until tomorrow.

~73~73~73~

Meanwhile Sheldon is in a sweat. He knows he needs to do something but if he walks in and Em is there he will have more than a few questions to ask. He decides to do as Raj suggested and 'man up'. Taking out his phone he dials a number and waits.

"Hello?

"Em?"

"Sheldon!"

"Hello. Sorry its so late, I have been at work. Are you at home?"

"Yes. Why where you at work? I thought you were a teacher?"

"No, I told you I am a physicist. Listen I know I should have called before. Is everything ok? Are you ok?"

"Yes Sheldon I am fine. I have a hospital appointment next week but I am fine it is just routine." Em hesitates "Do you want to come?"

Sheldon shudders "Err I don't thin that is a good idea. I am sorry Em I have behaved badly. I have been selfish, I have lots of things to straighten out. I will call you next week to see how you got on."

Sheldon disconnects the call and puts down his phone his hand shaking. Good lord the woman really did not know him at all. There is no way he could go to the hospital with her, he could barely function enough to call her. What a mess. But he had achieved his aim. Know he knew Em was at home he would go collect Amy from the club take her home and hope Raj had kept her safe.

Picking up his phone again he sends Amy a quick text. _"have just finished, I am really tired, how about I come collect you and we go back to my apartment and watch Dr Who and relax?"_

as he hits send Sheldon hopes Amy is not too drunk and giddy and doesn't want to make him dance and show him off.

Amy is positively giddy when she gets Sheldon's text and showing Raj and Penny skips off to the bar to order that virgin cuba libre for her man and a large wine for herself. She is so happy even the thought of Dr Who doesn't upset her!

~73~73~73~

Having changed into his suit pants at work and leaving his clothes and bag in his office Sheldon catches a cab to the club. He is seriously twitchy as he arrives. Using a cab, no cab pants over his suit, leaving his clothes and belongings at work! What on earth had become of him! Taking a deep breath Sheldon enters the now packed club and scanned the dance floor. Seeing Penny trying to dance with Leonard, Sheldon shook his head and turned to the bar. He saw Amy first smiling and laughing with Raj, but right behind them stood Steve! Could this day not get any worse thought Sheldon as he made his way slowly towards Amy. As she turned at the tap on her shoulder Amy squealed and threw herself into a startled Sheldon's arms. "Oh Sheldon thank you for coming. Look I have your virgin cuba libre here! Let me go get Penny and the others."

With that she darted off before Sheldon could stop her. Sheldon wiped his hand down his face and leant towards Raj. " I need to get her out of here now . The gentleman behind you knows me and this could get very awkward" Raj nodded and picking up his drink moved with Sheldon to the edge of the dance floor to intercept the others.

"Shelly!" shouted Penny as she jumped at him.

"Penny please! I have had a really long day and all I want to do is take Amy back to the apartment and to watch Dr Who"

"oh come on Moonpie dance first" said penny tugging at Sheldon and Amy. Amy grinned. Sheldon frowned. "I don't dance!" he grumbled and looked pleadingly at Amy, who took pity on him in her relief to know he was still talking to her.

She dropped Penny's hand, grabbed Sheldon and said "Ill call you tomorrow Bestie I need to get my man home and pamper him" Penny sniggered and watched a thrilled Amy drag Sheldon out the door.

~73~73~73~

Watching from his position at the bar, Steve takes out his phone and calls Carmen

" You will never guess what you have missed tonight " he says, filling her in briefly. His mouth slowly drops open as he listens to Carmen's response.

"Shit! Well well well... it appears Dr Cooper has some secrets he wants to keep" Steve hangs up the phone turns and watches the group of friends on the dance floor.

~73~73~73~


	11. Chapter 11

After Amy and Sheldon left, Penny Bernadette Raj Leonard and Howard all continued dancing, drank too much and were far from steady on their feet. Steve continued watching for a while then decided he would see if he could get any information out of the girls. He watched until the boys had moved back to the bar then then moved to the dance floor. Penny and Bernadette were more than happy for a little outside male attention and laughed and teased and danced quite happily with the handsome young stranger.

"Can I get you ladies a drink" he asked after three or four dances

"Sure why not" said penny, "our men folk seem to have abandoned us!" The three moved to the bar where Steve ordered their drinks. Bernadette excused herself to use the ladies and Steve saw his chance.

" I'm Steve by the way" he smiled holding out his hand

"Hi Steve I'm Penny."

"So Penny what do you do when you are not out dancing?"

"Oh I'm just a waitress, but hey ask Bernadette that when she comes back, its way more impressive! What do you do Steve?"

"Oh I'm a student at Caltech"

"Really? My boyfriend is at Caltech, well I say 'at' he is a physicist. He is brilliant!"

"cool, what's his name?"

"Leonard Hofstadter have you heard of him?"

"No, I don't know many people from the physics department only Dr Cooper. Do you know him?"

"Dr Whack-a -doodle! Yes" laughed penny "he is Leonard s room-mate and is dating my best friend Amy. He was here earlier you must have just missed him. How do you know Sheldon?"

"well I don't _know_ him, as much as have heard of him. He is well known at Caltech"

Penny laughs "I just bet he is! No Sheldon is a sweetie, he has a seriously beautiful mind and yes he is a little crazy, what with his comic books, his special spot and bowel movement charts but he is a good friend, and Amy is helping him loosen up with the ladies too . I cant believe he came here tonight for her. Sheldon Cooper in a night club is unheard of believe me! That man is straight laced pure science !"

Steve chuckled "Well I guess I shouldn't listen to rumours then. I heard he was a party animal!"

"NO! Sheldon doesn't drink or dance. Just goes to show Amy was wrong and he really does care for her for him to come here tonight. She really loves him!"

Penny was slurring her words and rambling now as the drink took hold, and it took her a second to realise Raj was stood just behind her

"Raj hey! Come meet my new friend Steve. He is a student at Caltech" Raj shook hands with Steve but turned immediately to to Penny saying

" Penny we are going to head home now, Leonard is really drunk and I think you may need us to help you to get him into the apartment"

Penny smirked "such a light weight!" she waved at Steve who said "was lovely meeting you Penny" as he watched her follow Raj toward her group of friends by the door.

Once out of earshot Raj said "Who was that guy?"

"Calm down Raj, we were just chatting, he knows Sheldon"

"oh" said Raj frowning.

~73~73~73~

Back at 2311 Los Robles Amy settled down on the brown leather sofa and smiled at Sheldon while he made her some tea. He had changed out of his smart black suit pants into his plaid pants and flash t shirt and looked much more relaxed than he had at the club. As he sits next too her Amy was surprised when Sheldon puts his tea on the table and his arm around her shoulders pulling her next to him.

"Amy I am sorry I have not seen much of you lately. My work has consumed me. I was late tonight because the latest experiment threw up some exciting results. I also didn't want to disappoint you again"

Amy sighed and laid her head on Sheldon shoulder. "Sheldon I wont deny I have been upset. I am your girlfriend and you have treated me badly but you need to know Sheldon that I love you . It has taken these past few months for me to realise how big a of part of my life you are and how empty it would be if I lost you. I know such declarations make you uneasy and I certainly didn't want to scare you off but I needed to tell you. I am always here for you Sheldon no matter what!"

Sheldon closed his eyes as Amy's words washed over him. Why had he been so very very stupid! He gently tilted Amy chin towards him and kissed her. Amy snuggled closer shifting so she was almost laying in Sheldon lap. The kiss was gentle and tender and as Sheldon lifted his head Amy smiled "I missed you Sheldon"

"I missed you too Amy."

This time the kiss was more passionate. Sheldon traced his tongue across Amy closed lips . As he felt her body relax he deepened the kiss burying his hands in her hair as he tried to show her how sorry he was through his hands and mouth. Amy sighed and pulled back."Sheldon! Wow!

Sheldon smiled sadly and shifted his weight so Amy was now sat across his knee

"Amy how do you feel abut us taking our relationship to the next level? I know you have wanted this in the past but I don't want to push you"

"Oh Sheldon" Amy sighed ,and gently touched his lips with her fingers "I love you and I am here whenever you want me, for whatever you are ready for. Tonight though, will you please just hold me?"

Sheldon nodded and wrapping Amy in his arms closed his eyes. Whilst the sofa wasn't exactly made for sleeping both soon drifted off wrapped in each others arms.

~73~73~73~

Sheldon awoke to Leonard practically falling through the door pulling Penny on top of him. "Sshh" Sheldon mouthed as he gently shifted out from under Amy without waking her.

"Oh good lord Leonard! Look at you"

Leonard giggled "I'm drunk!"

"Well I can see that" muttered Sheldon "come on, lets get you to bed"

Sheldon helped Penny move Leonard down the hall to his room.

"Thanks Shelly. Hey you and Amy looked cosy, you all ok now?" asked Penny quietly as they lay Leonard down on the bed.

"Yes, thank you penny, now if you will excuse me I had better get Leonard some water and painkillers for the headache he is sure to have when he awakes."

Sheldon scuttled out of the room returning with a glass of water and some tablets. "Goodnight Penny" he said as he handed them over.

"'night Sheldon" mumbled Penny who was now on top of the covers next to Leonard .

Sheldon moved back into the living room and stood looking at Amy curled up on the sofa. Smiling Sheldon sat back in his spot and stroked Amy hair. As he looked at Amy he realised how comfortable he felt with her right here right now. Maybe he had been looking for peace in the wrong place after all!

Just as he thought this Sheldon felt the phone in his pocket vibrate with a text message. Pulling the phone out Sheldon read _"hey dude you could have a problem. That guy you said you knew was chatting up penny after you left. __Thought__ you should know – R"_

"Shit" mumbled Sheldon and pulled Amy into his arms suddenly he needed that comfort more than ever.

~73~73~73~


	12. Chapter 12

Em sat in the waiting room at the hospital staring at the forms in front of her. Suddenly it all became frighteningly real. She was having a baby! What was even more scary was how much she didn't know about the father of her baby. She was able to fill in the medical details from her own family but she had absolutely no idea if there was a medical history of heart disease in Sheldon's and as for a history of twins she just hoped fate wasn't that cruel! It did mean she was probably going to have to bite the bullet and contact him though, because as much as she would like to keep her pride in tact, it wasn't just herself she had to consider now. She was lucky she had Carmen with her here today as her friend was helping her keep her nerves under control but when she saw tears in Carmen's eyes as they both saw the baby for the first time on the monitor, Em could not help but wish it was Sheldon with her not her friend.

When the nurse asked if Em wanted to know if she was having a boy or a girl she shock her head no. That may as well be a surprise, seeing as everything else had been!

At work later that afternoon Em told her boss her due date so she could work out her maternity leave and with that date in hand everything became a little more real and a lot more frightening.

As she dialled Sheldons mobile number and waited for it to connect, Em realised her hands were shaking. It had been a few weeks since he had called out of the blue and a few weeks since Steve had filled Carmen in on the information he had gleaned form Sheldon friends. Knowing he had a girlfriend and was a whole lot more than just a teacher did not really change how em felt, but it did mean anything she thought she knew was possibly a lie. Em was amazed how feeling a fluttering in her belly and seeing a swell as the baby grew made Sheldon deceit hurt less. She knew she had someone else to think about before she fretted about her own feelings.

"Hello?" came the tentative voice on the other end of the phone

"Sheldon, its Em. I am sorry to bother you as I am sure you are busy but I need to speak to you and it is important. Would it be possible to meet as it is not really something I feel comfortable talking about over the phone?"

"er … ok.. is everything ok?"

" now isn't the time Sheldon. I finish work at 7. I will be going home, then you can either meet me there or suggest somewhere else?"

"No no your place is fine. I may be a little late but I will see you later." the phone line went dead. Em look at her shaking hands and sighed. No turning back now

~73~73~73~

Sheldon sat staring at his white board after turning off his phone. He had known this was coming and in typical Sheldon fashion had tried to ignore it. After Rajs warning he had guessed Steve had quizzed Penny and knew enough about him and Amy to fill in Em and Carmen, and if he was honest he was surprised it had taken her this long to contact him.

Picking up his office phone Sheldon called Raj.

"I have a problem" he said without even introducing himself.

"let me guess the bird outside your window is mocking you again!" sniggered Raj.

"No Raj, focus! Em has just called me she want s to meet up tonight. What am I going to tell Amy I was meant to be taking her to the cinema tonight."

"Don't tell Amy anything, just call em back and tell her you don't want to see her any more. You have a girlfriend and you have decided to make that you priority. You know. Like you should have done all those months ago! Sheldon ,Amy is very happy with how you have been lately, don't spoil it now!"

"Raj I think we need to have lunch in that bar across the street. I need to tell you something and I need to ensure Leonard, and especially Howard, don't find out."

Raj sighed. "Ok Sheldon, but I have a meeting with Gablehauser this afternoon so I can't be out long."

"I will meet you at your office in half and hour." Sheldon again put down the phone this time he knew he was going to have to face up to the reality of his situation. He just hoped telling Raj wasn't a mistake.

~73~73~73~

"What do you mean she is pregnant" squeaked Raj staring at Sheldon mouth hanging open.

"What do you think I mean. She is going to have my child, and I don't know what to do!"

"er … what you should have done is kept it in your god awful plaid pants! And failing that used contraception! You are the cleverest man I now Sheldon, but right at this moment you are the stupidest!"

"Raj I don't need you to tell me this, what I need is advise. How I am going to tell Amy or my mother! Oh god! my mother!"

Sheldon was nearly in tears and Raj looking at him shook his head.

"I'm sorry Sheldon, but when Penny and Bernadette find out that you have betrayed Amy they will go junior rodeo on your arse! and you wont have to worry about your mother!"

"I've got to see Em, Raj, I can't not go. But what should I say?"

"I'm sorry dude, I really don't know. Maybe you should see what she has to say first."

Sheldon nodded and realised there was nothing else he could do. Sighing he put some money down for there drinks and stood up.

"Will you tell Gablehauser I felt ill and have gone home please. I need to focus on this now. I have to work out what I am going to say to Em. It has been so long since I have seen her, I don't know how she will react, or me for that matter. I'll see you tomorrow Raj. Thank you for being my friend."

Raj watched his big gangly friend walk away, head down, dejected and beaten. Who would have guessed the great Sheldon Cooper would fall victim to his baser urges and get a girl pregnant. Howard you could imagine, even Leonard maybe but Sheldon never! Shaking his head Raj walked back to Caltech.

~73~73~73~

Standing outside Em's door Sheldon realised how drunk he had been every other time he had been here. In the cold light of day he could see how much care Em had taken to keep the place neat and tidy. As he knocked Sheldon realised he did not know what he was going to say.

"Hi" smiled Em in a far more congenial tone than Sheldon had been expecting.

" Hi" he nodded back.

"Sheldon come in I'm not going to bite"

Em open the door wider and moved to let Sheldon pass. He glanced around the room, surprised that it looked different form his memory. Then he realised that piled in the corner was a load of baby paraphernalia and as he glance from Em's face down her body he saw the evidence of his child in the bump in front of her. He felt the blood drain from his face.

"Oh dear" he muttered as he passed out cold.

Em stood looking down at the lanky form lying prone on the floor. "Yep, lot of good he will do me" she thought as she slapped the side of his face, probably harder than needed, but who could blame her!

"Sheldon wake up!" she called, and as he refocused on her face, she helped him to his feet and moved him to the sofa.

"Before you start with any more lies or excuses I want you to know I know you have a girlfriend, I know you are some kind of genius, but I have my doubts about that! I also know you intended to ignore this mess we have found ourselves in. But Sheldon you need to face facts as you have noticed "she placed her hand on her bump "we are having a baby. I have a scan picture to show you and can get you a copy if you want one, but I really needed to see you as I have some questions I need answers too."

Still very pale and looking into her eyes so he could avoid the bump, Sheldon nodded."ok"

"I need to know if there is any medical history I should tell the hospital, heart disease for example, history of twins is another" Sheldon went, if possible even whiter.

"oh god, oh god" he mumbled.

"**P****lease** don't tell me you are a twin" muttered Em.

Sheldon nodded " oh Jesus will this not stop getting better!"

Em moved to the kitchen and poured Sheldon a large whisky and herself a large glass of milk. Retuning to the sofa they sat staring at each other.

"Well I guess it is too late to do much about it now," sighed Em trying to remain calm. "hopefully the hospital would have seen on the scan if there were twins and they didn't say anything so lets hope all our nasty surprises are over!".

Sheldon nodded still looking at Ems face, still in shock. He didn't react when Em took his hand and moved it to her belly. It was the small movement under his fingers that caused him to move his eyes down . Em smiled at him shyly.

"your son ,or daughter, is saying hello" she grinned.

Sheldon jumped up from the sofa ran to the bathroom and promptly lost his lunch and breakfast.

"That went well" muttered Em shaking her head. "Sheldon are you ok?" She called through the door. Sheldon emerged shaking his head.

"Em I have a girlfriend. I have friends and a mother who think I don't drink and have never had sex. How can I suddenly present them with this." He pointed at her stomach.

Em was suddenly angrier than she had been before this whole mess had kicked off.

"Well pardon me Dr Cooper. But I am not exactly having a picnic here myself! I haven't asked anything from you, other than information, and yet you still manage to make me feel bad. Sheldon I want you to leave and unless you can get a grip of yourself and this situation don't bother coming back..

Em sank down again onto the sofa hand across her stomach protectively, and felt the tears run down her face. She felt Sheldon move next to her, felt his hands tilt her head and pull her slowly to her feet. He held her in his arms running his long fingers down her back then up to stroke her hair. Just holding her as she cried.

They stood like that for a long time neither speaking just holding and comforting each other. Em couldn't say who moved first, her or Sheldon, but suddenly the holding had turned to kissing and Sheldons hand were gently tracing her swollen breasts.

"Sheldon, we shouldn't be doing this" gasped Em.

~73~73~73~


	13. Chapter 13

Em knew she was being stupid, she knew she would hate herself the next day, but the feel of Sheldon's hands caressing her and his lips suckling her neck and breasts were just too much for her to stand. The pair did not move from the sofa but were soon both naked hands desperately seeking each other. The only sounds were their breathing and the occasional moan, but their eyes never left each other. As Sheldon pushed into Em she closed her eyes but he whispered

"Look at me em" and she immediately did, knowing she couldn't refuse him.

He was gentle at first, carefully keeping his weight on his arms so as not to squash her, but as soon as he felt her squeeze him and her orgasm washed over him, he let go, thrusting hard and fast and shouting her name before collapsing to the side.

He turned onto his side moving her over so her back was nestled into his chest. He laid one hand over her swollen belly and the other held her hip. He closed his eyes and whispered. "I'm sorry. I am not being fair to you but you make me feel like no-one ever has."

Em put her hand over his and said nothing. Inside her head she was screaming "then stay here and love me" but she knew he would not.

"Have you told anyone about this... about us?" she asked quietly.

"Yes I have told Raj, he was shocked!"

"Will he tell your girlfriend?"

"No... he told me I had to tell you goodbye"

"Is that why you are here?" Em was very still waiting for Sheldons reply.

"I think so... it was why I came. But seeing you, holding you, I just get confused. I think it is a mistake to do this but yet I am here. I have an agreement with my girlfriend that means a lot to me. She means a lot to me. I cant walk away from her, or my job, or my friends"

Em was glad she wasn't facing Sheldon. She knew this was coming, she knew when she had looked at his face when he arrived that this would be the outcome, but to hear the words still hurt.

"Sheldon will you come see the baby?"

Sheldon hesitated.. "yes" he said quietly.

"You aren't going to tell anyone though are you?" Em felt Sheldon shake his head.

"Sheldon I won't hound you, and I wont tell your friends but you need to make me a promise. You need to stay away now. I cant keep doing this. I know I asked you here, but I have my answers now and if you keep coming I will keep letting you, I can't stop myself , and I need to be strong now for the baby."

"Shall I leave?" asked Sheldon quietly.

"Yes please" whispered Em feeling the tears roll down her cheeks. For a second she grasped Sheldons hand that lay on her stomach before letting him go. She didn't turn round when he climbed off the sofa over her. She sat up however, once he had stood, and quietly she dressed too.

As she held the door open Sheldon moved to kiss her but Em put her head down slightly shaking her head and, nodding, Sheldon walked away.

After Sheldon had gone Em went and lay on her bed. She was now 5 months pregnant. She had just told the father of her baby to stay away, and she knew this time he would. She wanted to chase after him and beg him to choose her, pride alone stopped her. Resting her hand on her stomach where Sheldon had been she whispered. "Just me and you now babe"

~73~73~73~

Sheldon walked home. He had no idea what he was going to say when he saw Leonard. Raj hadn't called, in fact no-one had called, so Sheldon guessed they had all gone for dinner as normal and had assumed he was working.

_He had felt the baby move_.

He had seen the changes to Ems body yet all he felt was panic. Em had told him to leave and he had. Would it be that easy to walk away if he saw the baby? Sheldon didn't know and he really had no-one he could ask. He somehow didn't think Raj would be open to him discussing his fears.

Sheldon slowly walked up the stairs taking his keys out of his pocket, he could hear voices that indicated penny was winning at halo without his help. Opening the door Sheldon noted Amy sitting in his spot, watching the proceedings but not joining in. Sheldon placed his bag on his desk and moved to get some water form the fridge.

"Hey Sheldon come see my score!" crowed penny. Turning Sheldon could feel Raj's eyes following him but he ignored him and said

"well done Penny, nice to see our record hasn't been broken! Amy you know that is my spot!"

Raj continued to try to catch Sheldon's eye and Sheldon continued to ignore him. When everyone was leaving Sheldon again ignored Raj moving down the hall to his room. He would wait til tomorrow to face the questions.

~73~73~73~

As the weeks and months passed Carmen grew more annoyed at Ems refusal to talk about Sheldon. She knew that they had met, she knew Em was struggling emotionally but she refused to talk about it. She had painted a beautiful mural on her bedroom wall for the baby. She had put together a crib herself refusing offers of help from Carmen and Steve, who was also bemused as to her refusal to contact Sheldon or even talk about him.

Em had started saving frantically. She had a great paying job and managed to save thousands of dollars now she wasn't drinking and clubbing and buying the latest fashion. She saw her friends occasionally but had built a protective shell around herself only letting Carmen and now her mum in.

The pregnancy was going well. She was meeting all the milestones and the Dr's were pleased. Em was very relieved to have it confirmed she was not having twins! With only a couple of weeks to go now however, she was scared. She didn't have anything to do with kids. Had never changed a diaper, or fed a baby even, and now she was going to have to do it all on her own.

Agreeing to meet Carmen after work for a catch up Em was glad to leave work early. She was in her last week at work and tired and emotional at what lay ahead. She hugged her friend and together they moved to a booth in the coffee shop facing away from the door. She therefore didn't see Amy, Raj ,Penny and Bernadette come in, and sit behind them in the adjoining booth. She wouldn't have recognised them if she had seen them, but Carmen may have done. As the two friends chatted about work then moved on to discuss Ems swelling ankles and fingers, Raj went over his plans with the girls for the anniversary party Bernadette was planning for herself and Howard. The group drank coffee which Raj was topping up from his hip flask.

"I cant believe it has been a whole year since I was maid of honour" said Amy in wonder." it was the best day of my life!"

Penny laughed." Amy now Sheldon has finally grown up and discovered what his genitals are for I am sure you will have your own wedding day in no time!"

Em froze in the next booth, catching Sheldon and Amy's names in one sentence she blocked out Carmen chatting about birthing plans and labour drugs and listened to the conversation going on behind her.

"Well," whispered Amy in a voice that was so full of excitement it barely qualified as a whisper! "Sheldon said last night, when we were in bed, he would not be opposed if I wanted to bring the 5 year plan forward!"

Penny gasped "Ames! that's amazing!" she squealed.

"I know! He didn't want me to get too carried away and suggested we didn't tell anyone, but I told him I wanted my day and he had better get used to the idea. He has holiday Gablehauser is insisting he take, so I thought to avoid a repeat of the débâcle of him working with me we would make that our honeymoon. I have told him I was going to tell you guys tonight and ask you Raj if would you like to repeat your wedding planner role?"

There was a shout of "**Em wait!**" from behind Amy, as Carmen watched in horror as her heavily pregnant friend stumbled out of the booth and moved towards the door "Em wait for me!"

Raj closed his eyes in horror as the heavily pregnant girl looked over her shoulder towards their table, tears streaming down her face. As realisation dawned he moved to stand, but the girl from the booth behind glared at him and pointed saying "NO!"

He sat quickly aware of Amy, Penny and Bernadette watching him. "Raj?" Amy questioned.

Shaking his head Raj stood up "I'm sorry Amy I have to go" and he followed Em and Carmen out of the shop.

"He didn't answer my question, said Amy puzzled. She hadn't noticed the pregnant girl in tears, but Penny and Bernadette had.

~73~73~73~

Once outside Raj scanned the street looking for the two women. He saw them huddled on the far corner, one obviously comforting the other. He knew he should probably not get involved, but seeing the heavily pregnant girl in such obvious distress and hearing her friend call her Em convinced Raj that this must be the girl Sheldon had told him about. He walked up to the two women and said "Ladies excuse me, I am Raj. I couldn't help but notice you leave the coffee shop. Can I help?"

Em looked at the stranger. "Raj? Sheldon's friend Raj?" she gasped. Carmen glared at the man "Just leave us alone. You and your friends have done enough!"

Raj looked at Em helplessly. "I am so sorry" he offered quietly. Looking at the girl in front of him he was amazed she would look twice at his neurotic friend. Even very heavily pregnant and red faced from running and crying she was a beautiful girl.

"He told me you know." he said quietly. "the others don't know though."

Em nodded "I know." she sighed, "Look, I'm sorry Raj I guess that was Sheldon s girlfriend you were with, you had better go." she turned her back on Raj grasping Carmen's hand tightly for strength.

Raj asked "when are you due?"

Em shook her head, but Carmen replied "2 weeks"

Raj muttered "I am so sorry!" again not knowing what he could say to make up for what distress Sheldon and now himself and the girls had caused.

"Just go" muttered Carmen and guided Em towards her car. Raj watched them walk away. He couldn't face going back and talking about a wedding. He couldn't face seeing Sheldon as he might just tell him what he thought of him. So Raj went home. He didn't call the girls or Howard or Sheldon. He went home and thought about what he had seen and heard.

~73~73~73~

After dropping a positively giddy Amy back at her apartment, Penny took Bernadette back to apartment 4B. " What do you think that was with Raj and those girls?" Penny asked once inside.

"I don't know. He looked shocked didn't he. Shall we go see if the others are home and know anything?"

"I don't know" hesitated Penny "I guess Raj may have come back here to see them?"

The girls crossed the hall. They knocked and Sheldon answered, he was obviously settled in for the evening and was reluctant to let them in

"Your men folk are not here, I thought you were off on a girls night with Amy and Raj?"

"We were but Raj ran off! Have you heard from him?"

Sheldon frowned. "no, why would he do that, Amy said she was going to mention the wedding. We thought he would be happy!"

"She did mention it! Way to go Sheldon! but it was weird, these girls were there and Raj chased them!"

Sheldon looked exasperated. "he needs to sort himself out! Chasing women out of shops isn't going to find him a mate!"

"No these girls weren't like that, one was pregnant and crying her friend seemed angry at us but we don't know who they are. Raj chased after them and then didn't come back. We thought he may have come here."

Sheldon felt the blood drain from his face and turned quickly toward the kitchen, under the pretence of making tea. "Well I'm sorry I haven't seen or heard form him, but if I do I will get him to call you"

Obviously being dismissed the girls shrugged and went back across the hall. Opening a bottle of wine they soon forgot their little mystery and settled down to watch 'the bachelor.'

Sheldon however felt derailed. He knew immediately who the girls had seen and could only imagine what had transpired. Picking up his phone he texted Raj.

"_W__as it Em?"_ said his short message.

"_yes"_ was the abrupt reply.

Sheldon didn't know what to say or do. Em had made it very clear she wanted him to stay away and now just as he could see a future with Amy ahead, things began to get messy again.

Did Penny and Bernadette suspect anything? Had Amy seen Em? Sheldon sat staring at his phone for a long time and he cursed the night he had walked into that club looking for an escape.

**A/N: Thank you so much for the kind reviews follows and favourites. Nearly at the end now. **

**Special thanks to smilin steph and Jislane for their kind words and encouragement that mean a lot. x**


	14. Chapter 14

Carmen received Ems text just as she was leaving work. _"gone into labour going to hospital now!"_

Never had Carmen driven so fast in such a panic. She had agreed to be her friends birthing partner and she felt scared herself, so goodness knows how Em felt. As she ran up the steps into the hospital Carmen saw Ems mum in a gown, hat and slippers.

"Its a girl!" she told Carmen. "They had to do and emergency c section."

Carmen went white .

"They are both ok. They are just settling them in there room, come on come meet the baby!"

Feeling wobbly after her race to the hospital, Carmen followed ems mum into the room. Em was propped up on her bed, a tube coming out of her hand and frankly looking shell shocked. Next to her in a crib, wrapped in a pink blanket, was the tiniest baby.

"Wow!" whispered Carmen leaning over the crib "oh Em, she is gorgeous, look at all that dark hair, and those long finders and toes, she is beautiful!"

Em smiled tiredly. "It all got a bit mad at the end there! She is fine though, and I guess the c-section saved me hours of pain and pushing!"

Carmen grinned. "Have you named her yet?"

"I was thinking Katherine after my grandmother, Katy for short" smiled Em .

"Lovely" said both her mother and Carmen together.

As Ems mother left to start spreading the good news to the family Carmen asked gently

"Do you want me to call Sheldon?"

"No, thanks though. I will ring him tomorrow. He should hear the news from me and I cant face the call now, but I will do it in the morning."

Carmen nodded, then grinning said "Can I hold her?"

"Of course" Em smiled back.

Gently lifting the tiny bundle from the crib Carmen sat cradling the baby.

"Em she really is beautiful." as Katy opened her eyes Carmen muttered "shame she has hers fathers eyes!"

Em sniggered "all babies have dark hair and blue eyes when they are born."

Katy began to grumble so Carmen gently handed the baby to her friend so she could feed her.

"You look a natural!" said Carmen in awe!

Em smiled "No! The nurse showed me what to do just before you came in! I told her she could show you how to do her diaper!"

Laughing the two friends sat quietly chatting until Ems mum returned.

"Everyone sends there love! I have said I will let people know when you are up for visitors, you might want a day two get used to this little bundle first!"

Em smiled as she gently rubbed Katy back. "Thanks mum"

Having settled the baby back into her crib, and bidding Em a good nights sleep, the two women left. Em lay gazing at her daughter. Wow she was really here she thought as she drifted off to sleep.

~73~73~73~

Sheldon was at work the next day when his phone rang. Across the desk sat Raj. They were discussing the latest paper they were working on and disagreeing about the time frame for publication. Things were getting heated and just as Sheldon phone rang off the door opened and Leonard and Howard entered to see if the two men would be joining them for lunch. The phone on the desk rang and Sheldon grabbed it snapping "Yes, what?" rudely whilst still glaring at Raj.

"Sheldon its me" said Ems voice hesitantly.

Sheldon froze. " I am at work I told you not to call me here!"

Em snapped back "Pardon me for bothering the great Dr Sheldon Cooper. I am in hospital, I don't have my watch on and I have just had a sleepless night giving birth to your daughter. I thought you might want to know" she then promptly hung up the phone.

Sheldon stood frozen in shock.

"Hey buddy, you ok?" asked Leonard noticing Sheldon had gone white.

"yeah... if you would please excuse me gentlemen..." He pointed to the door.

Looking at Sheldon strangely the men made their way towards the door. "Sheldon are you sure you are ok?"

"yes! Goodbye" Sheldon slammed the door on their shocked faces and slumped down in his desk chair.

"I swear he gets odder everyday" muttered Howard, heading towards the canteen. At the end of the corridor Raj stopped, "I'll catch you up guys, I have left my papers in Sheldon office and he is likely to burn them if I don't rescue them!"

Opening Sheldon door Raj closed it behind him and said "was that Em?"

Sheldon nodded. "I have a daughter!"

"Congratulations Sheldon!"

"hhhmmm!" was all Sheldon replied.

~73~73~73~

Em stayed in hospital for 5 days. She was climbing the walls by the time she was allowed to go home! She had had lots of visitors which had been lovely but she just wanted to take her baby girl home so she could get her settled.

Carmen came round the day after Em and Katy got home. She was nervous holding the little girl who was so very small, and stared in awe as Em bathed her at settled her down for a nap.

"Can you believe you have a baby?" Carmen asked.

"Its weird, I cant imagine not having her now! She has only been here a week and I can not imagine my life without her. When I got home yesterday after mum had left, I literally sat staring at her for hours! She is perfect!"

Carmen smiled. "I am so glad you are happy Em. I was really worried. I could not do what you are doing. I would freak out! Steve called and was asking if he could come visit. What do

you think?"

Em smiled "You two are really friendly now! Something you want to tell me?"

"No" said Carmen blushing, "Well we did go for dinner last week and he does text me every day! He is sweet really and I think he was worried about you too"

"Of course he can come visit. I really don't feel I have anything to be ashamed of

now. I did, but not now"

"Cool I will bring him round tomorrow before we go out"

The two girls chatted a bit more, then seeing Em was tiring, Carmen left her to rest.

~73~73~73~

It was two weeks later that Raj bumped into Steve at the canteen at Caltech. Steve had become a regular visitor round Ems, visiting with Carmen every week. Seeing Raj sat on his own was unusual as he normally had his little group of science geeks with him, including Sheldon, who Carmen had banned him from talking too on Ems insistence.

Seeing Raj on his own, playing angry birds on his phone, was too much of a temptation for Steve, so he went and sat next to him. Without saying a word Steve pulled Raj's phone out of his hand and sent himself a text. Then using his own phone he forwarded the photo of Katy he had taken on his last visit to Raj and waited for the astro physicist to comment.. Raj looked at the photo, looked at Steve then back at the photo.

His eyes filling with tears he said "She is beautiful. What is she called?"

"Katherine" replied Steve.

Raj nodded . Then without saying any more got up and walked away.

~73~73~73~

Raj tried to talk to Sheldon that night after Halo, but Sheldon was ignoring him again. He had mentioned the photo when he had returned form the canteen to his office and Sheldon had quite literally got up and walked away. Now the girls were in the kitchen washing up after their evening together. Amy had left early to go check on her lab monkeys and so it was Bernadette and Penny who heard Raj shout

"Sheldon I am done with you! If you can be that much of a bastard then I don't want any more to do with you" as he slammed out of the apartment.

"What the frak..." said Penny staring at Sheldon.

Sheldon just glared, stood up went to his room and slammed the door.

Leonard and Howard had watched the whole thing with bemused expressions and clearly no more of an idea as to what was going on than the girls.

"Problems in wedding planning heaven do you think?" asked Howard flippantly.

"No" said Penny. "but there is definitely something going on. Raj knows something I'm sure he does" Bernadette nodded.

Raj had stopped on the bottom stair at 2311 and sat wondering what to do. He couldn't force Sheldon to face up to his responsibilities and he did not want to be the one to break Amy's heart telling her what he knew. But he knew he could not carry on seeing Sheldon lying to Amy like this and pretend nothing was wrong.

In his room Sheldon sat on the edge of his bed and felt trapped. He had successfully blocked thoughts of the baby form his mind. Now he knew her name, and he knew Raj had seen a photo. Pulling out his phone he sent Em a text.

"_I hear you have named her Katherine. Can I come see her?"_

As he hit send Sheldon was not sure he had done the right thing, but he knew he couldn't not see her.

~73~73~73~

Em had been shocked when she received Sheldon text. Steve had told her he had seen Raj and had shown him a photo so she should have been prepared, but it was still a surprise. She honestly didn't know what she wanted now. Katy was the best thing that had ever happened to her. She hadn't realised how in love she would fall with her little girl but fall she had.

It was 2 days before she replied to Sheldons text.

She simply said _"ok"_

His response had been a prompt _" I will be at you home at 6 on __Thursday.__"_

Sheldon had not spoken to Raj since his outburst at the apartment, so did not mention his up coming visit. Penny had been watching Sheldon closely and quizzing Leonard about his room mate. Leonard admitted Sheldon was not his normal self but put it down to wedding nerves as Amy was getting quite excited with her plans now and texting Sheldon almost hourly with updates and ideas.

Penny wasn't convinced and decided to talk to Raj if things didn't improve.

~73~73~73~

Em made sure Katie was dressed in one of her new pretty dresses that Carmen had bought her She fed, changed and put her down for her nap early so she was at her best when Sheldon called.

Letting him in felt weird. It had been so long since they had seen each other and so much had changed. Looking at Sheldon though, it struck Em just how like her daddy Katy was. Her eyes that Em had been convinced would change were the same startling blue and seeing Sheldon nervously fiddle with the strap of his bag drew her attention to his long fingers that his daughter had also inherited. Smiling to herself Em beckoned him into the living room where Katy was lying in her Moses basket. Cooing gently as she picked up her daughter she whispered "Come say hi to your Daddy, Katy."

Sheldon stared at the baby in front of him. Even he could see the resemblance as his own eyes stared back at him. Sitting down on a hard backed chair Sheldon held out his arms and cradled his daughter.

"She is beautiful" he said quietly. "Raj said she was, and he was right"

Sheldon gazed at the little girl then looking at Em said "How are you? Are you ok?"

Smiling she said "Look at her Sheldon how could I not be ok. She is perfect, and as scared as I was and as tired as I am I would not change a second of it !"

Nodding Sheldon returned his gaze to the baby in his arms. "She looks like me!"

"I know!"laughed Em. "Can I take a picture of you holding her?"

Sheldon twitched and hesitated.

"Sheldon if we never see you again at least I will be able to show her her Daddy did come see her, hold her and cared."

Sheldon nodded.

Em used her i-phone to snap a few quick pictures. Sheldon did not look at the camera but placed his long finger into his daughters tiny fist and felt her hold on tight.

Sheldon stood and placed Katy back in her crib and turned to look at Em.

"Thank you for letting me see her." he said awkwardly shifting his feet, his gaze on the floor.

"Will you come see her again?"

Sheldon nodded but did not meet Em's eye and she knew he was lying.

~73~73~73~

After Sheldons visit life continued pretty much as it had before. Em settled into a routine and began to reassess her priorities. Prior to Katy's arrival Em had enjoyed a life of working hard and playing hard. Now all she wanted to do was spend time with her baby. Every day Katy seemed to grow and change. Ems new favourite time of the day was waking up in the morning, seeing Katy's smiling face and smelling her hair as she lifted her baby into her arms and Katy buried her face into Ems neck.

Em still saw Carmen and Steve but their relationship had changed . It was hard to keep every thing the same when you no longer cared about clubs and drinking, or the latest shoes and handbags. It was unreasonable to expect the others to care about how many ounces of milk Katy had consumed or how many hours sleep they had gotten the night before.

Em sent one of the picture of Sheldon with Katy to his cell phone one evening. She didn't get a response but this didn't surprise her. She now felt her and Katy could move forward and build their lives together and leave Sheldon to do whatever Sheldon wanted.

~73~73~73~

Penny noticed Raj and Sheldon were still hardly talking. Amy was so excited about the wedding she had convinced Raj that he did want to help out, and as it involved little interaction with Sheldon Raj had agreed. It had become like a military operation with Amy holding weekly briefings and assigning new roles. Sheldon should have been proud but as it was Sheldon had seemingly little interest in the plans and just agreed to whatever Amy suggested, telling her it was her day so she could have whatever she wanted.

The latest meeting was taking place in the boys apartment, as Amy had decided she needed to check on Leonard in his role as best man. As the gang sat around the room Penny watched Sheldon make tea in the kitchen and assemble bottles of water from the fridge onto a tray. He appeared to be only half listening as Amy explained to Leonard the need for all the grooms men to match their respective bridesmaid in both height if possible and colouring.

"Ames, don't you think that is taking things to the extreme" muttered Penny, having seen Leonard look desperately at her for help.

"No Penny, I have a vision and I expect Leonard to help make this day perfect"

"He cant change someone's height though" sniggered Bernadette who was realising she had definitely had a lucky escape having a last minute wedding.

"OK granted some of my wishes may be a bit precise but please Leonard try and focus."

Leonard nodded and picked up his note book and pretended to take notes. Sheldon had moved to his white board in the corner and continued his work..The others nodded and agreed with everything Amy said in the hope this torture would end quickly.

Having satisfied Amy they were all on track the gang decided to go out for breakfast. Sheldon was reluctant but when he heard Raj say he was going to go into the office Sheldon agreed. Penny frowned and realised things were really no better.

"Leonard why is Sheldon avoiding Raj still?" Penny whispered as they walked down the stairs.

"I don't know. Raj has avoided halo night and paint balling for the last few weeks and when I asked him he just said he was busy. Howard doesn't know either, I asked him"

~73~73~73~

Raj did go to the university after leaving the apartment. He had found that his avoiding Sheldon had improved his work if nothing else. He missed spending time with Howard and Leonard but even looking at Sheldon made his blood boil. As he entered the canteen he saw Steve. Crossing over he sat down opposite and said "Will you ask Em if I can visit her please?"

Steve looked confused "I will ask but I'll be honest with you, Em is happy, her and Katy are doing great and I don't think she will be keen. Seeing Sheldon was hard enough."

"Sheldon saw her? When?" Raj asked stunned.

"Listen Raj, this is between Em and Sheldon. Ask Sheldon if you have any questions. I know he visited, I have seen a photo of him and Katy. I don't think Em is expecting him again but you need to leave me out of this. You should stay out of it too."

"That easy for you to say. Sheldon is getting married soon and his fiancée has no idea he has a daughter."

"Like I said Raj talk to Sheldon not me"

Steve got up and walked away leaving Raj staring after him.

~73~73~73~

Penny arranged for Howard to meet Raj at his and Bernadette s apartment so the girls could find out once and for all what was happening with him and Sheldon. Seeing the girls waiting for him Raj knew he was in trouble. Howard handed him a glass of wine as soon as he entered and sitting down with a resigned sigh he said,

"I don't want to talk about Sheldon! I know you have questions but it is not my place to say why we have been arguing, you need to talk to Sheldon."

"Raj you know he wont tell us, and at this rate the wedding will be a disaster with you two barely able to look at each other."

"Maybe there shouldn't be a wedding" muttered Raj.

"RAJ!" Penny shouted "stop being so dramatic and tell me what Dr whack-a-doodle has done to annoy you"

Scared Penny was going to go all Nebraska on his ass Raj pulled out his phone and pulled up the picture Steve had sent him of Katy and showed it to the girls.

"Who's that?" asked Penny quietly, scared she already knew the answer just from the look on Rajs face.

"That is Katerine. Sheldon's daughter."

Howard moved to look over Penny's shoulder at the picture.

"son of a ….. how long have you known this" growled Penny standing up and throwing the phone down on the seat she had just vacated and pacing the floor.

"Oh God... poor Amy" gasped Bernadette.

"You can see now why I cant bear to be in the same room as him. Em, Katys mother, is the sweetest girl. She deserves better than the way Sheldon has treated her. She doesn't deserve this crap and her friends have closed in around her and wont let me see her. Sheldon refuses to acknowledge any of this is happening, or so I thought, but I found out recently he has been to see Katy."

"Shit" said Penny "We have to tell Amy, she deserves to know!"

"It will break her heart!"said Bernadette

"She still has a right to know what Sheldon has done. Leonard will never believe this!"

"Penny, Sheldon is going to be mad I have told you guys. Be careful I don't want you to all fall out too.

"Raj right now my concern is Amy, not Sheldon. He doesn't deserve our loyalty but Amy does.

~73~73~73~

Amy looked at the faces of her friends then back down at the phone in her hand.

"How... Why..." she mumbled.

"Ames" Penny moved to put her arm around Amy's shoulder

"No! Shouted Amy standing up. "I don't need sympathy, I need to see Sheldon and ask what he has to say for himself. Someone is obviously jealous of our relationship and trying to break us up"

"Amy look at that baby. This isn't a joke. Sheldon has a daughter, her name is Katy. He has been to visit her! He has lied to everyone and he had done so whilst arranging to marry you!"

Shaking her head Amy stood up and handed the phone back to Raj.

"Thank you all for coming. I would like to ask you to please not mention our conversation to Sheldon. If what you say is true then I need to ask him face to face. Raj please can you forward me that picture."

Nodding Raj quickly forward the picture, then followed Penny Howard and Bernadette out of the apartment.

Amy sat back down and picking up her phone stared at the baby.

How could Sheldon do this to her? He had been distracted again recently and now Amy knew why!

The wedding was planned, invitations sent and Amy shuddered at the thought of explaining to her family that the man she had paraded in front of them, had gloated about for hours, had gone and got some stranger pregnant.

Amy wasn't jealous of the baby, she did not particularly want children of her own. It was more the fact Sheldon had slept with someone else. Knowing how long it had taken to persuade Sheldon to hold her hand, let alone anything else, the thought of him being intimate with someone also made Amys stomach turn.

"_Sheldon we need to talk"_ Amy typed into her phone and hit send before she could change her mind.

"_Sure Amy, do you want to skype?"_

"_no Sheldon I need you to come here now please"_

"_Amy is everything ok?"_

"_Sheldon just come round now please we will talk when you get here."_

Sighing, Amy moved to the bathroom washed her face and changed into fresh clothes. She needed to feel strong and confident for whatever she was about to learn.

~73~73~73~

Amy answered the door on Sheldon's third knock. Closing it behind him she motioned him to take a seat and placed a bottle o water on the table in front of him.

Sheldon frowned. "Amy? What is wrong?"

Not speaking Amy just opened the picture on her phone and placed it on the table in front of Sheldon.

"Oh" Sheldon mumbled.

"OH! All you can say is OH! Sheldon you better have more to say than that."

"Amy … I ..." wiping his hand over his face Sheldon started again "Amy, nothing I say will make this better. Is this Raj's doing? Did he show you this?"

"Really Sheldon? Blaming Raj? I thought I wanted to hear what you had to say but I really don't. Please will you take this as my formally declare our relationship agreement and our engagement null and void. I will inform all concerned parties the wedding is cancelled and I will be sending you any bills that arise due to our late cancellation. I do not want to see you again Sheldon. Please leave."

Sheldon, shocked at this unexpected turn of events did as Amy asked. At the door he turned

"Amy I'm... "

"Just go Sheldon"

He left.

Amy picked up the phone on the table and deleted the photo.

Then typed:

"_Sheldon and I have cancelled our wedding. I do not wish to go into details. Please respect my wishes. Amy Farrah Fowler" _

Sending the message to everyone in her address book Amy put down her phone and closed her eyes.

~73~73~73~


	15. Chapter 15

It took the friends a while to regroup after the sudden implosion. Leonard was in shock. Living with Sheldon he saw on a daily basis how the groups breaking had affected his room-mate, and whilst in total agreement with Penny about the magnitude of Sheldons betrayal of Amy, Leonard still felt a certain amount of empathy.

Sheldon was the friend he himself had treated badly in the past and whom had always forgiven him. Sheldon had been loyal to Leonard, and whilst crazy, regardless of a Dr report, Leonard knew Sheldon was hurting.

It was one evening when instead of paying Halo Leonard found Sheldon sat eating a bowl of soup instead of pizza, staring at his board from his spot on the couch, that Leonard decided to talk to his friend.

"Hey buddy, how are you doing?" He asked Sheldon gently.

"As well as can be expected." muttered Sheldon not looking Leonard in the eye.

"Do you want to talk? I promise I wont judge you, I just think maybe you need to talk, to clear your head. I'm worried about you Sheldon"

Half smiling Sheldon nodded. "Maybe this whole fiasco is affecting me. I haven't told anyone yet, but I have applied for a place on the latest expedition to the north pole. I figured it cant go any worse than the last time I was there!"

Blushing slightly Leonard nodded.

"I just feel it will be better for everyone if I am not here! I don't know what Penny has told you but I did go to visit Em." Pulling out his phone Sheldon showed Leonard the picture of himself holding Katy.

"She was perfect Leonard, absolutely perfect. She held my finger so tight. I have let down so many people and now I know I am letting this baby down too. I have to got prove myself. I know that sounds selfish, I know she may never understand, but I cant face her or Em again right now."

"Sheldon maybe Em doesn't want you to prove yourself, maybe she just wants her baby to have a father!"

"Maybe Leonard. I wouldn't know how to be a father to her though if I cant even look at myself in the mirror. I cheated on my girlfriend, I cheated on my friends in my deceit, and if I am ever going to be able to look Katherine in the eye again I need to know I have done something with my life that is more than lies."

"Sheldon that wont matter when your daughter falls over. When she wants tucking into bed at night. Believe me Sheldon I know. A cuddle is more important to a child than a paper or a doctorate!"

"Well the paper work has been sent, Siebert seemed more than happy. I should hear by the end of the week and then I will be out of everyone's hair for 3-6 months."

Sighing Leonard got up and made tea. This was more for himself than his friend. Suddenly it became clear that the daily routine imposed on him by his precise, demanding but loyal friend was going to change again.

~73~73~73~

Amy had taken a break from the group after calling of the wedding. Penny and Bernadette had texted daily wanting to make sure she was ok, and gradually Amy had come back to the group. Sheldons absence had made this easier.

Sheldon had sent Amy a text the morning he left, telling Amy he was sorry for his indiscretions and hoping she found the love she deserved. Whilst this seemed and inadequate apology to Penny, Amy knew Sheldon was sincere, and with the help of her friends gradually began socialising more. Raj had seen a strength in Amy he had not noticed before, and their friendship grew stronger and closer. Raj was even able to talk to Amy in private without the need for alcohol.

Whilst he initially put this down to the fact he did not find her physically attractive he was grateful for Amys friendship and privately he acknowledge there was much more to a relationship than looks.

The other members of their now smaller but close group had witnessed the growing friendship, but did not mention it when either Amy or Raj were present.

The group did not meet at 2311 Los Robles any more. They usually met at Raj's or Bernadette and Howards. This had been initially to avoid Sheldon, but even when Sheldon had left they continued with their new routine.

Leonard occasionally got an email from team members of Sheldon telling him Sheldon was pulling together some amazing results but remaining very isolated. Nobody, however, heard from Sheldon himself.

~73~73~73~

Em handed in her notice at work. She had some savings and had decided that she did not want to go back to life in the fast moving world of business. She wanted to be there for Katy, so when Katy was a little older she planned on retraining and moving into education. This way, when Katy was old enough to go to school, Em would be able to be there with her at the beginning and end of the day, and in holidays too.

Katy was growing fast. She was a happy baby, meeting milestones on time or early. She still had piercing blue eyes like her father but an easy smile and a very social nature. She spoke her first word "momma" at 6 months. She was walking by 8 months and was as happy playing with her toys as she was spending time with people. Not having any friends with babies to compare, Em just enjoyed her little girl.

~73~73~73~

_**12 years Later**_

Penny left her apartment at 2311 Los Robles quietly. Leonard had been working with the new lazers with Leslie Winkle and was still asleep. The couple had married 5 years ago after a long engagement. Penny was happy. She no longer worked at the cheesecake factory but at the local theatre company teaching acting to children.

Howard and Bernadette had moved in to the boys old apartment, and Stewart, from the comic book store, now rented Howards old room. He loved having Mrs Wolowitz fuss over him!

Raj and Amy had formed a close friendship. Raj was comfortable now talking in front of Amy, Penny and Bernadette without the need for alcohol, and he credited Amy with this achievement. The pair were still single but happily so.

Amy had and on again, off again relationship with Zack much to Pennys amusement, whilst Raj had agreed to an arranged marriage, with a girl who lived in India. He had met her 5 summers ago and she was due to be moving to America to formalise details for their wedding in a few months.

~73~73~73~

Katy was now 13 years old. She had a love of maths that left her mother bemused. Em had enrolled her in classes after school to satisfy her need to learn, but had made sure she stayed at the local school too. Em could see so many signs of Sheldon in Katy. She was very grown up in so many ways, but she loved Disney films, sleep overs with her friends, and reading the Harry Potter and Twilight books.

Katy did not really mention her father. Every year Em had taken a photo of Katy and sent it to Sheldon. He never replied, so Em was never even sure he still had the same number. Em made sure Katy knew her father was a leading physicist. She told her that the reason he was not with them was not because Sheldon did not love Katy, but because he had work that was important. Even she thought these words sounded hollow on nights when Katy was ill or having a teenage tantrum, but Em was proud of her daughter and loved the life they had built for themselves.

Katy had been accepted on a summer maths camp which she was very excited about and Em was thrilled to see her daughter embarking on this new adventure with her friends. Whilst Katy would be away Carmen had arranged for her and Em to take a short break together, they had maintained there friendship despite how different their lives had become and Em was thrilled to have time with her best friend to catch up and just be friends with no outside worries.

Em was shocked therefore when on Katys 3rd night away she received a text form Katy saying

"_Hey Mom, you'll never guess, but the guest lecturer is Dr Sheldon Cooper! My DAD!"_

Em stared at the text for a full minute before handing her phone to show Carmen.

"Oh God! Do you think Katy will be ok. Shall we go get her now. It'll only take a few hours by car." Carmen fussed. She was far more protective of Katy than Em and hated how forgiving Em was when talking to Katy about Sheldon.

"No, I have to let her do this. It is up to her if she wants to talk to him, take it further. I just hope he doesn't shun her, break her heart"

Em sat quietly, suddenly remembering how she herself felt, what seemed like a life time ago, meeting Sheldon for the first time.

Em didn't hear form Katy again until the next evening. Answering her phone with a smile she heard her daughters excited voice.

"Mom, I spoke to Sheldon last night. He told me I could call him Sheldon, not Dr Cooper! He was a little odd but he liked the presentation I gave and helped loads with the new stuff we have learnt. He has invited me to have pizza tonight but I said I wanted to check it was ok with you first."

"Katy it is lovely to hear your voice" smiled Em "I am glad you got to meet Sheldon.. If you want to go for pizza that's fine honey. He is your dad and I know you have lots in common"

"Thanks Mom. I cant wait to see you tomorrow. I have had a great time but I have missed you !"

Smiling Em replied "I've missed you too babe!"

~73~73~73~

Em closed her eyes as she hugged Katy outside the school. She was so delighted to have her baby girl back. Katy was bouncing with excitement and talked non stop all the way home. Camp had been a huge success. New friends had been made, Katy had been horse riding and swimming as well as seemingly doing maths morning noon and night.

Katy didn't mention Sheldon until Em asked "So how did you feel meeting your dad?"

Smiling shyly Katy replied " It was cool. My friends were so impressed! He told me last night he has been nominated for a Nobel! Can you believe it! He showed me pictures of me he had on his phone, the ones you had sent him. He said to tell you he was sorry for everything. He said thank you for the pictures."

Em smiled. "I am glad you met him baby. If you want to stay in contact that is fine by me. I am so proud of you Katy. I love you!"

~73~73~73~

**A/N Thank you to everyone who stuck with this story. For my first go it has been really lovely to receive so many friendly comments. May even try this whole story writing thing again ;-) xx**


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